Here Now

[Ogdru]

Yeah, fit here. I've survived quite a bit, and have made tremendous effort on myself, but find myself stuck, isolated and craving relief. The circumstance around my CPTSD is still very much ongoing with no definitive end in sight. To continue the metaphor of the storm, it just refuses to dissipate.

I do well in therapy, have some very great friends but struggle to go forward at this time. It's uniquely difficult being bound continuously by grief.

Currently, I'm O-kay, mostly indulging in my various escapes while I do well enough at work. In therapy, it was revealed via my reading material of choice it seems I am looking for company in relation to my CPTSD.

So hello and thanks for having me.

[Kizzie]

Lots of company here Ogdru and we all get it which is really nice. You don't have to be hypervigilant about what you say (although sometimes it takes awhile to see or rather feel that it's OK).

Sorry to hear you are feeling stuck.  Maybe reaching out here will help with that 

[NarcKiddo]

I'd like to echo what Kizzie said.

Welcome. I hope you can gain comfort from your time with us.

[Bermuda]

Hi there, welcome. Ongoing trauma is, well, traumatic... At the very least we all can relate to that. 

I hope you find what you are looking for here. We are a nice group.

[Ogdru]

Thank you, any guidance as to how exactly best get footing here? Read the guidelines, and I presume peruse the various forums and partake when compelled? Read resources as well?

[Kizzie]

Yes please read the guidelines, after that when and where you post is up to you.  It is a big board so hopefully you can find sub-forums that relate to your specific trauma. 

The other thing you can do is make some posts here to give some more background so members can get to know you and you can gauge how comfortable or not you are posting. Oftentimes members will point you to threads or info that relates to your experiences. The other place a lot of members hang out in is the Recovery Journals section. You mentioned that the circumstances around your CPTSD are ongoing so that may be a good place for you because you can talk about it as it happens and it won't get lost.

Whatever feels comfortable to you though of course. 
 

[Ogdru]

Understood, yes I greatly appreciate that direction.

On background, yes I actually am very comfortable discussing my background and what the circumstances surrounding my CPTSD. Its more so the energy. I was thinking of making a post of it well, just to hear what other people hear and think but I want to express it in a way that is, genuine but also coherent. Its very layered and complicated, has its moments when there is a cascade of existential dread inducing events and of course its on going issues.

Just a little things about me, that is nothing very heavy. I very much enjoy graphic novels, writing, literature, computer games, TTRPG's, board games, art, and creative endeavors in general. I currently have remarkably great therapist, I have 4 1/2 years of sobriety which has become remarkably normalized for me, and a very close albeit small group of friends I've known all for quite some time which I am proud of.

I think will post regarding CPTSD soon, it would be nice to maybe have people who understand instead of being an aberration composed of loss and trauma.

Thank you again for the direction and look forward to looking around at my pace. 

[storyworld]

The circumstance around my CPTSD is still very much ongoing with no definitive end in sight. To continue the metaphor of the storm, it just refuses to dissipate.

I am so very sorry. I imagine it feels very hard to heal when you are also experiencing things in the present to heal from. I hope you find encouragement and support here. I have.

[Denali]

Welcome Ogdru! I'm sorry to hear that you're still in the storm. I hope being among others who understand will be helpful to you.

[Papa Coco]

Hi Ogdru,

Welcome to the forum. To your comment that your CPTSD has no definitive end in sight, welcome to CPTSD, the gift that keeps on giving for a lifetime. Like AA, we strive for progress, not perfection. And that progress is what we share with each other here. That's okay with me. When I stopped trying to be 100% cured, I was able to relax and just accept my injuries. I measure my healing by the year now, not the day. Each year I can say that I'm a bit stronger than I was a year ago. That's progress and it's wonderful.

I spend most of my time in the Recovery Journals section. The link to the Recovery Journals is just about midway through all the links on the home page. Just about the center of the page.

I hope this forum is a good experience for you. It has been a great experience for me. Not being alone with my trauma triggers is a monumental help for my healing journey.

[Ogdru]

Hello Papa Coco thank you for the welcome.

I would like to politely express I do not appreciate speaking of my CPTSD in a cavalier tone and making light of it. Its a very AA/NA way of going about things, which I do hope this forum shares little in common with those programs in the way it approaches trauma.

I appreciate your understanding.

[Papa Coco]

Ogdru,

I'm sorry for how I worded my post.

I do understand your position and I sincerely apologize.

I'm glad you found this forum and I hope that the empathy and sincerity of the members here are helpful to you as you navigate your life with C-PTSD.