To the Medical Insurance

[healingme]

there I was again feeling robbed when the brand new medical insurance coverage I've been given by my employer recently refused to cover my expense at the clinic.

having avoided medical care for the majority of my life due to "no insurance" & the fear of spending what I might end up needing later on for my kids left me feeling denied, unworthy, helpless and threatened.

I catastrophized often, felt unsafe and dreaded what's to come.

when I've been finally given this shiny sparkly insurance card, I felt overjoyed and sincerely happy. however that didn't last when I received the rejection notification yesterday.


It left me feeling devastated to say the least, I dove head first ever so deeply into utter sadness & despair.


I recognized I need help, so I grabbed my emergency toolbook filled with all the healthy coping techniques I could use to soothe myself into a better feeling state.

I chose to EFT and it worked. I felt lighter..

I then realize why this incident hurt so bad is because of a really similar past wound.

I discovered that I didn't forget how my Ex. "possibly narc treats" played me for a year before giving me the medical insurance card offered by his company to each employee's spouse. only to find out the first time I needed to use it that the date had expired.

I wanted nothing from him, not the card or anything else since. I saw clearly that he's capable of harm..


I would've normally surrendered, but I decided this time I won't, so I called the Insurance company & I'm waiting for their response, fingers crossed.. I will go the extra mile if I have to, because you know what.... I deserve it 



 

[Armee]

I have to admit I chuckled seeing the subject line of this letter. Insurance companies ate awful with this stuff, and I am so sorry your ex withheld medical care. God how awful.

I've had to fight insurance too and it's so sad because it is so hard to stand-up for ourselves and what they ask of us is quite triggering or even retraumatizing.

It is worth fighting back though if you can. Otherwise they get away with saying they provide the legally required coverage without actually covering anything. Ugh. With you in this ugly fight.

[healingme]

I'm glad you found the title funny 
thank you so much Armee, I appreciate it