Trauma Superconference 4th edition 2024

Started by tofubreadchillicoriander, December 22, 2023, 05:13:55 PM

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tofubreadchillicoriander

Held between end of January (29th) and beginning of February (4th) in 2024. Brings in over 70 speakers.

Free registration at:

https://www.consciouslife.com/conferences/tsc-4

Blueberry

#1
I signed up for this and have watched 2 sessions so far.

A freebie pre-session on "How trauma affects your Hormones" by Dr. Anu Arasu.

One session I mentioned here: https://www.cptsd.org/forum/index.php?topic=15739.0

I made some further notes on the same topic, but referring to myself as an example:

Moving beyond Fight/Flight means getting to a point where we can tell people close to us that is to say people who care about us (so not FINO - family in name only) that we are triggered by something, maybe something that they do, even a seemingly harmless thing like watch a particular TV programme. Tell them, preferably not in a blaming way, but trying to seek a solution.

However, Sander Jones said for those who care about us and are not triggered themselves, he suggests that they accept the method used by the triggered person to communicate and any time-lapse. So if the triggered person didn't manage to communicate till a week had gone by and then only by letter instead of speaking up, it's because the person is so triggered that any other method is impossible.

IME that can be difficult when both sides are triggered (see inpatient therapy situations :whistling: ). When he was explaining that, I thought so much of previous times when I wrote notes to other tenants in my building - sometimes that worked, sometimes it didn't. I also wrote notes to FOO as a child/teen and sometimes that worked/sometimes I was heard because they weren't confronted with feelings they didn't want to see/hear/sense. But mostly notes didn't work either. FOO/FINO did a lot of gaslighting when I tried to speak up directly or just a bunch of non-respectful behaviour, like "Oh ยง$!$ shut up!". No attempt to find a solution that could work for everybody. FINO showed me mostly that they didn't care and they'd always find some reason like my voice was dwindling away while I was speaking or I'd started crying or they "couldn't remember" (whatever was supposed to have happened, supposedly happened yesterday but that was too far back in the past), I'd spoken up at an inconvenient time (and next time I tried they couldn't remember of course) :blahblahblah:  :blahblahblah:  :blahblahblah: or plain old physical violence combined with "we don't want to listen to you" - mostly from B1 or M.  There was no attempt to find a middle road, something that would feel safe for everybody. It was more like: "BB has a problem therefore BB is the problem. Shrug. BB has to deal with it." So that kind of reaction tells us - these people aren't safe. (I may add more later)