Mother

[Bermuda]

Mother, can you hear me? Can you see me at all?
Am I too tiny?
You can see all the wrinkles in the sheets but why not me?
I shouldn't be so whiny.

I bathed and brushed my teeth.
I did my best to look clean.
Am I still so ugly that it's painful to look at me?

I dare not cling to your leg or cry for help at all.
I know that you don't like that... But I feel so sooo small.
I'm too little to understand but I know if I reach up you'll swat my hand.

I'll wait until you're finished doing your important grown-up things,
until you've hung up the phone,
until the neighbours have left,
and until we are all alone.

I don't want to embarrass you or make a scene.
I won't interrupt.
I promise you won't see me.

I'll listen out from the other room to know if you're in a mood.

Creeping out quietly, not a squeaking of a door, lifting my feet gently, not dragging my feet on the floor.
I know you don't like that.


I just came to say that I have put away the dishes and tidied up the bed.
I'm sorry.

I've gone and I've made you mad again. I forgot the rules.
I'm sorry but sorry isn't enough because I should know better,
I am four years old!
I forgot that it's quiet time now, and you need to unwind
from all the grown up stuff that I don't understand.

Maybe if I bring you crisps or make you some tea,
I can make it up to you and you could forgive me.

I'm a big girl and I'll be a grown up one day too.
I will learn someday how rough it must be for you.
I promise I will listen. I'll go to bed without food.
You don't need to tell me. I already know.
See I am a big girl too.

One day I'll be better, I promise you Mummy.
One day I'll make you proud.
I'll go away forever then I'll never be too loud.

[Little2Nothing]

Wow! I felt the pain behind your words. That little girl needed love and tenderness. She needed to know she was seen. Thank you for sharing that. 

[NarcKiddo]

That resonates. It makes me want to cry. Heck, it has made me cry. No little girl should have to think such things.

Very well written.

 

[Papa Coco]

Bermuda,

That's a very powerful poem. Very powerful. I'm nearly in tears. Thank you for sharing it.

It tells the story so well.

 

[PaperDoll]

Your poem is beautifully written and so moving. Thank you for sharing.