Will the nightmares / flash backs ease?

[Jes5ie16]

I have been having therapy every week for the last 20weeks. My therapy will soon be coming to an end which is scaring me. The flashbacks and nightmares I have about the sexual abuse as a child and rape in later life still haunts me. I wake in a panic, sweating, crying. Sometimes I see shadows in my room and feel my uncle is there. Sometimes I wake feeling that one of them is on top of me. I thought they would have started getting easier or less intense but it seems to be getting harder and harder. I hate this. I don't have the support of family and have no close friends. Feeling so alone

[Trees]

Jes5ie16, I am so sorry to hear you are having such a rough time being tormented by past horrors.  I have experienced this myself, all alone with dreadful nightmares and EFs.  For a long time I tried not to sleep at all, and I kept the lights and TV on all night so I wouldn't have to wake up in the dark all confused by some dreadful nightmare.  And I took medications.

I do feel much better now than I did then, but there is no way to predict when these things will get easier.  It is important to give yourself as much loving care as possible.  Try to eat healthy and try to get some physical activity.  For some people, medications or nutritional supplements give some relief.  I was always on the lookout for anything that might give me a little comfort.  I haunted the library looking for books by people like me.

You deserve peace and safety and comfort.  You deserve loving tenderness and respectful consideration.  Here on OOTS are lots of people with current and past experiences like yours.  Here on OOTS you are not alone.

Sending you hugs           

[Kubali]

To Jes5ie16

How horrid for you! That sounds so unfair. People can be unbelievably cruel. I'm sorry to hear how badly you are suffering

I'm wondering whether the intensity of the nightmares is directly linked to the Therapy? We sometimes think that Therapy will help us recover immediately. I know I did. I forgot that digging around in my mind will turn up a lot of dirt. That's the point isn't it? To take a look at what is harming us. This has to happen first before we can bed everything back down again and put it to rest.

It's so painfu. It's unfair. However it's the healing process. Tell yourself it's the beginning of your healing journey. Remind yourself that you are cleaning out the attic for a bloody good reason! Your peace of mind which is priceless and precious.

I think you are extraordinarily brave and have shown tremendous courage and endurance.

Kubali