JDog's Journal

[Jdog]

Wow - I had a gift yesterday in the form of a snail mail letter from my father's youngest sister.  In the letter, she said that she loves me and is proud of me, misses both of my parents (they have both died) and letting me know she is basically doing fine for her age.  I think she is 81.  It was nice to get this, as I certainly feel like a Motherless Child, without siblings at all and with no close family anywhere within 1,000 miles from my current home.  I will snail mail back.

I am appreciating the fragility of this life of ours, the importance of connections, and the overall value of seeking the good in all nooks and crannies.  It is easy for me to become depressed, overwhelmed, defeatist.  But every day allows me a choice to respond in a more uplifted manner.  I must make that choice, as everything depends upon it.  I had a nice day at work yesterday, very busy day, and it left me feeling good.  As I left the final meeting of the day, I had to walk across the school cafeteria.  And my students who were there enjoying their after school snack between studying and other activities called out to me, wanted me to see them, wanted to connect because they like me.  You cannot buy that sweetness, it just exists in the world.  What a blessing.

[Three Roses]

Thank you for this post, jdog, it was very comforting and encouraging to me. 

[Jdog]

3Roses, I am so glad it was a source of comfort and encouragement.

[Blueberry]

And my students who were there enjoying their after school snack between studying and other activities called out to me, wanted me to see them, wanted to connect because they like me.  You cannot buy that sweetness, it just exists in the world.  What a blessing.

 

[Hope67]

Hi Jdog,
It's so nice that you got that letter - and some lovely things said in it.  Very meaningful and special.   
I smiled when I read about your students connecting with you because they like you - that is great. 
Hope 

[Jdog]

Thank you for the encouragement, friends.   Teaching sure has its ups and downs.  The day after I posted the feel-good news, I had difficulty with a slew of boys, one of whom was the so-and-so who had falsely accused me of giving him "the finger" and posted a photo taken from an angle which makes it look that way (my co worker and I were being playful and giving a sideways peace sign and laughing).  Anyways, that boy continues causing problems for others, too, and is now going to a district expulsion hearing since he physically assaulted an adult hall monitor.  The other irritating kids were given detention and will be ok.  I think they got high at lunch and were being dumb and rowdy in class as a result of the marijuana. 

Life is good, however.  My wife and I just returned from attending a couple of professional baseball games out of town as a celebration of her birthday.  We have colds, but will be ok soon one hopes.  I have planned out next week's instruction - and it's a short week due to tomorrow being Memorial Day - and only need to decide on final exams.  I am considering offering a short project as an option for the more advanced students, one in which a person calculates the amount of land required to grow that person's food consumed over the course of a year.  There is a bit of research required, then keeping track of one's foods for a period of time, calculating, and writing a report. I will maybe give the less capable or studious an option to take a multiple choice test covering the major components of nutrition and how the body digests food.  There is a biology book that covers much of that material which they can work from over the course of the week prior to exams. 

What a world we inhabit, friends.  It comes down to the need and responsibility to seek out healing structures, positive people, and certainly the good within ourselves.  I am learning so much at this time.  I have a great deal of gratitude for the healing, the learning and the growth which is yet to come.

[Jdog]

Yeah, I am still thinking over whether or not to have students bite off the assignment to do with calculating the land needed to grow their food.  Maybe best to save it for another time.  I am still sick with a cold and need to scale back rather than scale up my workload.  Their work inevitably makes more work for me, longterm!

Thanks for the nice words about my positive outlook.  I struggle to maintain it each day! 

[Blueberry]

I am still sick with a cold and need to scale back rather than scale up my workload. 

Amen to that one. Self-care involves getting over our colds before we add more work. I need constant reminders here too - so thanks for reminding me

Thanks for the nice words about my positive outlook.  I struggle to maintain it each day!

    for maintaining it each day, especially since it's a struggle. 

[Jdog]

Sharks ahead!  Or behind, as it were!  I'd rather have a debate than BE da bait!!!

[Jdog]

I'm exhausted, wish I could sleep in today rather than go to work.  But the end of the school year is at hand, so must soldier on.  I want to get back to my more active self, and hope to at least do a light workout at the end of my work day.  It is just one of those mornings when every little thing seems like a big thing.  I am working my way out of an EF, I believe, and I wish it were faster and easier to get out.  Ha.  The only way out is through, I know.

[Jdog]

Thanks, BH.  I'm starting to emerge from the primordial muck....

[Jdog]

I wrote earlier about the student in my classroom who created havoc not only with me but with others in the school.  He assaulted a custodian and was placed on suspension and slated for a disciplinary hearing.  We had thought he was headed for expulsion.  Not so fast.  The hearing office cancelled the hearing, and even after reviewing the video showing the kid shoving the custodian several times and saying he would "beat his *" for blocking the kid from getting into an off limits area, the hearing officers said it was really all the custodians fault.  The custodian should have never chased after the kid and never put an arm up to block him from proceeding through the closed area.

Sigh.  The other teachers of this kid and I are fed up.  The poor custodian won't press charges, and now none of us truly feels that the district cares about staff safety.  Not a good feeling at all.  Will the kid be attending the same school next year?  Who knows.  But this year truly cannot end soon enough. 

[Jdog]

A small victory today.  The errant student will be kept out of my class for sure for the rest of the year (this week and finals).  Our union rep is still working to get more traction with admin at the district level to see whether the kid can be prohibited from attending our school next year.

This is all very triggering and exhausting.   Thank goodness for this site and for the email connection with my therapist.  I can't see her IRL any longer, and haven't been able to see her for 4 years now.  That's how great she is.  4 years of answering my emails above and beyond the call of duty.  Who gets that kind of good service these days?  Amazing.

[Blueberry]

  for the victory!

for triggering and exhaustion. I know them well in this general kind of situation.

[Jdog]

Thanks so much for the support, Blueberry.  I have slightly more hope that the principal gets the severity of the situation now and is standing up for the cause of staff safety.  Time will tell whether or not anything will actually change overall.