Time Blindness

[rainydiary]

I am wondering if anyone else experiences time blindness and what you have found to be helpful in supporting yourself.

I notice I have the most trouble on days where I don't have work or clear structure.  I get stressed by things I need to do to adult (like chores) and worry about not having time to do things I enjoy.

I have tried roughly planning out each day with a written calendar - just giving a rough estimate of what I'll do hour by hour.  That is helpful for me to realize that the stuff I don't particularly want to do won't actually take that long and I'll have time to do things I like.

I am wondering if this has a bigger impact on me than I am recognizing though.

[Cascade]

Hi Rainydiary,
Thanks so much for starting this thread!  It's an interesting topic.

Depending on how you experience "time blindness," I might know what you're talking about.  For me, I don't really unconsciously lose hours of time like traditional "losing time," and it sounds like you're referring to something different, anyway.  Since I had to stop working, I've had absolutely no structure to my life and also had to give up putting my tasks on my calendar.  Using the calendar was an excellent way for me to stay grounded, get things done, and remember everything.  But now the best way I can describe my days is that I am sleepwalking.  I might as well be asleep as far as the rest of the world is concerned, except I'm awake and have to be conscious, experiencing pain and emotional flashbacks.  I guess all of that to say that I think I can identify with what you're going through but unfortunately haven't gotten to a point where I am strong enough to keep a calendar and daily schedule.  Yes, understanding that those events can be moved if needed helps, as does seeing that undesirable tasks really won't take that long.

One idea I had other than calendaring was a written to-do list with checkboxes, something physical I could see and physically check off (or cross out) with a pen.  That act of signifying something is done can bring closure and a sense of accomplishment.  Same idea, just a different format than a calendar.  I did this years ago before I kept my digital calendar, but found I preferred the calendar because I figure any task is going to take time that has to be accounted for, which I could do better on a calendar than a list.

I am wondering if this has a bigger impact on me than I am recognizing though.

The calendar sounds like a good thing.  Can you say more about the impact it's had?  Do you suspect it's causing new stress?

Wish I could help more.  You're not alone in this struggle!
   -Cascade
   

[Kizzie]

I feel like you're right that it may not be not doing chores that is key, but fear of missing out on enjoying life. Afterall, we did not have much of that and have a lot of catching up to do in the fun/relaxation department. Unless it is actually a big thing (e.g., not paying rent), perhaps you need to let yourself just be free of responsibility without guilt, at least for the smaller, less important things.

I guess I'm suggesting maybe you owe it to yourself to be less responsible in some ways. If you view yourself with compassion and as needing and deserving of fun and freedom it may help to not feel guilt ridden. So maybe keep the big things on the list and do away with the smaller things, at least for a time. You have some structure that way, but you also have time for fun.