My introduction

[Tipsu]

Hey, im Tipsu and im 26.
Im not sure what im suppost to say here and it's hard to know where to start because there's so much to say. But I think the best place to start is my childhood. I grew up in a home where emotional neglect was part of my daily life. My mom was emotionally unavailable, and sometimes physically abusive, which left me feeling worthless and unimportant. My dad was abusive to my mom and sister, and his behavior created a lot of fear for me as a child.

I've also had some difficult experiences with my stepdad that are hard to explain and even harder to process. Those experiences left me confused about my worth and boundaries.

Because of all of this, I've struggled a lot with feeling like I don't matter.

I've often felt alone, desperate for connection, and unsure of who I am or what I deserve. I want to find people who might understand these feelings and what it's like to grow up in an environment that felt unsafe and invalidating.

I hope that by being here, I can connect with others who've had similar experiences and know what it's like to feel this way. I'm still trying to make sense of everything.

[Little2Nothing]

Tipsu, welcome to the forum. You will find people here who not only umderstand but also care deeply. 

[AphoticAtramentous]

Welcome to the forum, Tipsu. I'm sorry things have been rough for you. But if you're looking for understanding and validation, I think you've come to the right place here.

Regards,
Aphotic.

[Papa Coco]

Welcome to the forum, Tipsu 

Thank you for sharing your story. You really do have a lot to process right now. I'm glad you had the courage and foresight to seek out a community where you can share this healing journey with others who can understand what you are feeling every step of the way.
 
I joined about three years ago for the same reasons you mention in your introduction. The forum did not disappoint. I am hopeful for you that you will find it helpful too.

Feeling lonely and fearful seem to be at the core of our struggles. What better way to handle loneliness than to share it with others who feel it too.

Welcome

[Chart]

Welcome Tipsu, so sorry to hear of your struggles. Sadly they are known by many here. Sending hugs if that's ok.
 

[SenseOrgan]

Hi Tipsu, welcome here! I'm sorry you went through so much and it has affected you so deeply. There are many people here who can relate to your struggles. I arrived here not long ago and it definitively is a lovely bunch  

[NarcKiddo]

Welcome, Tipsu. I'm glad you found us.

[Dalloway]

Welcome, Tipsu. Your introduction resonated with me very much. I also grew up with a parent being emotionally neglectful and physically abusive. I´m sorry that those things happened to you, but I´m very glad you found us. This forum has been nothing but a safe anchor for me from the very first day I´m here. I hope you´ll find here what you are looking for. 

[Hope67]

Hi Tipsu
Welcome 
Hope

[Kia1212]

Hello - Part 2

Even after that, I continued trying to get some kind of explanation or acknowledgment from her up until the day she died in 2018. But nothing ever came. I've come to realize that narcissistic psychopaths never apologize. In their minds, it's always your fault—you deserved it. They'll say things like, "You got fat" or "You let yourself go."

It broke my heart, and the pain continues even now when I try to explain my feelings to my siblings. Their responses are dismissive: "You were going through something; we didn't do anything."
This is why I recently went no contact with my family of origin. I cannot allow these people to remain in my life. Protecting my peace and well-being means cutting ties, and I'm finally choosing myself.