Jeff Foster

[woodsgnome]

I'm brand new on board and am settling in to this community and the many gifted people here sharing their journey through the fog, and out of the storm, as it were. Of course, the fog redevelops and the storms plunge in yet again, but I find it valuable to have found friends on this site who know the territory. I'm isolated from personal friends, living a modified hermit life-style deliberately chosen when I moved to the woods, built my own place, mostly in reaction to my own horrid rounds with people as a youth.

I wasn't exactly sure where to put this, but the "books" section seemed apropos. I'll just share an author that helped me walk out of the fog and helped me when the crazy inner rumbles threatened my spirit yet again. Isolated as I am, it's been largely with books and other reads that I've found solace, but amazingly had jobs in tourist places that put me in touch with lots of people, even was a noted public speaker, but the private pain traveled with me, and stil does--but at least I was always  able to retreat.

I've been struggling with this for over 40 years, been through lots of therapy (resisted thinking I needed it) and approaches ranging from Jungian stuff to enneagram and other personality systems, journal writing, you name it, I may have been there. I've come up a little short on bodywork approaches, but more due to some other health issues rather than any overt resistance--although some of the body issues seem related to CPTSD for sure.

So a couple years back I decided to try therapy again, and was determined to root out all the nasties of the monster memories and move happily on. Wow, what a joke that was--but at least I've learned that one.

Shortly into that therapy round, I ran into a free online series called "Self-Acceptance" put together by Tami Simon of Sounds True Productions in Boulder, Colorado. The series features a number of presenters, some well-known, others not so much; some neuroscientists, therapists, authors, all individually interviewed in 40-50 minute sections.

Well, they all kind of sounded "jargony" for me...except for one who stood out named Jeff Foster. So I looked him up--he has a website (life without a centre) and has several books--one I picked up was called The Deepest Acceptance and there's a tape program he put out with it, also via Sounds True. Actually, his best book was put out by Nonduality Press, simply titled Falling in Love With Where You Are.

His approach stems from what's called the nondual philosophy, but that's just a label--its ideas resonate with me, but more importantly they hit me at a time I needed them, too. Foster also has numerous little clips on YouTube that are great--one that got me started was simply titled "There's Nothing Wrong With You".

Foster's approach isn't pushing any dogma, it just reflects someone who also traveled some rough waters and came out realizing that life is like ocean waves, and we're up, down, in storms and calm, and always a part of it even when we don't realize or remember or even know how. It's not specifically geared to tackling specific CPSTD issues, but I actually found that lack of jargon to be a strength--it's all about life and self-realization, including those of us whose waves crashed on the rocks and were thrown back into the sea, where yes, those pounded waves roll on. His descriptions are so much better than mine--you might like to take a look at Jeff Foster.

Sorry this ended up being a bit long-winded, but I felt it might help if I threw in some of the personal observations that drew me to his materials, as they're not precisely tailored to the CPTSD conundrum. 

[woodsgnome]

Well, okay, here I am again, with a brief addendum.

While Jeff Foster isn't specifically CPTSD, the book that helped the most with those issues is probably known to most of you--Pete Walker's COMPLEX PTSD: FROM SURVIVING TO THRIVING.

It's thorough coverage blew me away, although I was disappointed to find it doesn't have an index.

I've seen it refereed to on some other feeds, and concur with one commentator who noted that she has to absorb it in slow chunks. I found my own read (and re-reads) like that, too--plus just the delving dredges up flashbacks.

It's a beatiful book.

[woodsgnome]

So here's another of his takes, from his current newsletter:

   IN LOVING ARMS
If you feel sad for no reason,
embrace the reasonless spontaneity of your sadness!
In the first light of morning,
when you hear a bird singing her spontanous song,
you're not pushing for reasons.
Sadness does not arise to be healed.
It arises to be heard.
It arises to be held,
here, in the loving arms of awareness.
- Jeff Foster

There's also a facebook page with very poetic quotes which I find quite insightful and comforting:

https://www.facebook.com/jefffosterquotes

Thanks.
 

[Kizzie]

Welcome to OOTS WG    and many thanks for this resource. His writing just reaches right inside and is so very relevant to CPTSD recovery.  Being present is a major challenge for most of us, living much too much ion the past and wishing for a better future we aren't in the here and now -- moreso than most people. 

The quote BeHealthy included resonated deeply with me as several of us are currently having a discussion about a lack of will and this seems to speak to that in a clear,  direct and utterly human manner.  It's here if you want to have a look and join in - http://outofthefog.net/C-PTSD/forum/index.php?topic=1634.0;topicseen

Again, welcome and thanks for letting us know about Jeff 

[Boatsetsailrose]

Hello woods gnome
Thank you for sharing your discoveries -
A deeper journey started for me 5 yrs ago when I was sitting in sat sang here in Bristol UK - I got to feel me who I truly was outside of the mind - those sittings gave me something wonderfull ' a sense of me ' 'I' and I then went on to scotland to a retreat facilitated by Jeff foster - I really related to his own sufferings and journey, his boy next door approach and his non teacher approach. . He pointed me to deeper ways of being and thinking and I got a lot from it ( plus being around others wanting the same )..
Over the past 5 yrs have developed such a lot and I can't quite believe it's only been that amount of 'time' - hey 5 yrs of good personal development is worth x ... ? Multiple by I couldn't really say ! A LOT

If u can ever sit with Jeff I would highly recommend - I hear he has become more world wide these days

I believe cptsd is a gift to me now ( just my experience ) it has pointed me to get what I need to heal and continue to do so and am so grateful for this forum and people who specialise in the field -
I have been through a time of solitude and now am coming to a place of poking my head out in the society again -
I'm on my way to being whole not that I ever wasn't but to feeling more healthy and better - work to continue and Colors to live

Thank u
Blessings

[Widdiful Falling]

Hi there. 

Jeff Foster sounds pretty cool. I do like his lack of jargon. It seems like he's speaking to you as a peer rather than an authority figure in his article.

Something I have a lot of trouble with is keeping present. I look to the future, try to expedite my arrival, and then burn myself out and end up in the past. I'm looking to break this trend. Thank you for the help in doing so.

[Boatsetsailrose]

There is an app called 'headspace' can get the first stages free ( and I found is enough to keep using that without carrying on with the system-
It is basically a training programme for the mind - to create present experience ' mindfullness' in our everyday life -
The guy who developed it is from UK was having struggles went to the east and then came back and developed the system-

I'd highly recommend it !

Simple yet so effective

Much better than having a book - although the power of now is a great book