Books - Part 1

[lonewolf]

bheart, this book is amazing. I just got it out of the library. It will be a keeper! Thanks for sharing.

[wingnut]

Compelling information. Perhaps this is part of the area where trauma reshapes our brains.

[Boatsetsailrose]

I just wanted to share my experience of recovery through 12 step programmes -

My experience hasn't been that I was in the wrong needed to acknowledge that and make amends -

Re my mother I tapped into all the pain and resentment and saw that I was self seeking in this - the 12 step process helped me to ' grow and develop a further part of my adult self that could see I was looking for myself 'in her ' and this just was never going to happen-
I started to have more compassion for first myself and then for her - she was / is sick
When I got to the amends process I didn't make direct amends as this was too dangerous to both of us - I did it as a spiritual exercise and let go -
I now genuinely don't feel anger towards her and a lot of the fear has gone too -

The 12 step process gives a lot of people a lot of growth and freedom -
It may not suit everyone I understand that - but giving people the option to explore it for themselves if they want to is important I feel -

What happened to me has never felt like my fault in my recovery - it has when I haven't been in recovery -
I needed to grow and grow I have freedom was all I ever wanted
I am not a child anymore some bits are but majority are not -
Growing up and seeing it through the eyes of an adult is the best

[Nicole13130]

I found benefit in "The Time Cure" by Philip Zimbardo when it came to addressing the huge, crushing, all consuming picture of my trauma and the effect it was having on my ability to perceive my past, present and future. In all honesty, that book gave me hope that I could see a past, present and future again in a healthy way.

I also really benefited from all the works of Brene Brown. (The gifts of imperfection, Daring greatly, rising strong) I watched a lot of her conversations with Oprah on youtube. I had deep shame from what I went through and I didn't even realize it. It had a big impact on my relationships with others as it festered. She makes shame so human and I appreciate that.

Finally, I was profoundly impacted by "The Book of Forgiving" by Desmond Tutu and Mpho Tutu. I did not understand what forgiveness was until I read this book. I had heard people say forgiveness is a gift that you give yourself, but I could not comprehend that considering the damage inflicted on my life with no remorse. Wow. Reading it was an awakening. It was filled with wonderful meditations and journaling exercises that respected the pain and the healing and the time such a process takes. Not only did it address forgiving others, but it addressed forgiving yourself and asking for forgiveness from others. I hope others aren't turned away by the traditional thought that forgiveness is somehow exonerating the perpetrator of our pain. It is really a book about freeing yourself from the shackles of that pain and no longer defining yourself by it.

[kda]

This may be old news here, but my therapist (an EMDR specialist) had me read The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma, by Bessel van der Kolk. It was spectacular. Van der Kolk was one of the original proponents of the complex PTSD designation. I highly recommend it!

[Wanttothrive]

Oh wow, I'm so glad this was posted. It looks good, though I don't know steps to make myself feel safe. Any ideas about that?

[phoenix.rising]

Alice Miller's books are extremely helpful for healing from CPTSD. I have read three of hers.
The Body Never Lies
The Drama of the Gifted Child
Thou Shalt not Be Aware

[Donna]

Some kind of exercises that will aid in digging deeper with the self exploration and touch into feelings. For example, a friend has been tasked with writing a letter to her mother, which she'll never send, but that type of thing has to be healing (and hey, I think I may try that).

Writing is helpful, but sometimes it would help to have an assignment or a topic, direction, etc., or even some subject to think about with the purpose of aiding healing. Art therapy sites are good for that, but I'm looking for ways to keep focused and keep working. Reading and therapy are good, but I need another direction of push. Does that make sense? I suppose there are probably a few websites if no books, specifically.

I don't have a quote...just wanted to reply & couldn't find any reply spot.  Perhaps Pete Walker's book, The Tao of Fully Feeling would help...his guide to feeling genuine sorrow for one's self & all one has gone thru has been helpful for me.  Also, the book by Sebern Fisher entitled Neurofeedback in the treatment of developmental trauma is very in-depth & has been helpful for me.

[EricS]

Trauma and Memory - by Peter Levine, this man is truly amazing, incredible insight(s) into what it takes for healing to occur .

[Chris336]

Great thread! I'm going to have to read through it more thoroughly, when I have more time, to gather a list of what I think will be most helpful for me.

I am currently reading Cptsd from surviving to thriving by Walker. I like most of this book; it's really helping me understand a lot of the connections between my childhood and how I am as an adult.

I don't agree with everything he says in the book, however. Some of it seems off in a way I can't describe yet.

Also, I need more specific step by step suggestions about the grieving process. So far, I get that he's telling me to get angry and to cry. That's not specific enough. I need diagrams, worksheets, recipes, etc. Also, I need more info about somatic healing. I have a copy of The Body Keeps the Score but found it intimidating in length and vocabulary. I don't want to start that one until I almost done with Walker's.

I'm also trying to read Chapters 5 and 6 of Trauma and Recovery by Herman. It is slow going because I feel myself getting very anxious reading the first person descriptions of abused adult children's stories. I will take it as slow as I need to and skip parts if I need to. I want to read these chapters because this is a foundational work in this area, and she gives a definition of cptsd. I want some of her background that leads up to her definition.

Thank you for this thread. It's a great resource.   

-Chris

[Three Roses]

I encourage you to read From Surviving To Thriving in its entirety - Pete Walker is considered by most of us here to be the preeminent authority on healing from cptsd. However, I also found it difficult to read, and I found I had to read it slowly. This could be because I was trying to digest new and potentially threatening material. I now keep a copy of this book on my nightstand, along with The Body Keeps The Score. (Interestingly enough, I found the latter to be the easier of the two to read.) Imo these two books are indispensable.

The grief and anger about the abuse I went through was and is really hard for me to tap into. I find it's easier if I try to think of how I would feel if I saw it happening to someone else. Grieving and "angering" (as Mr Walker puts it) are highly personal, so I'm not sure if anyone can really tell you how to do it. Imo this would be like telling someone how to fall in love. They're deep, personal emotions.

There are some books out there about the somatic aspect of healing from trauma. I have one I'm trying to get up the nerve and energy to read called "In An Unspoken Voice" by Peter A. Levine, PhD.

Hope you find my comments helpful.

[Kizzie]

Just wanted to mention that in addition to this thread there's also a robust book section members can have a look through here - https://www.outofthestorm.website/books-1 

[Aphotic]

Just wanted to mention that in addition to this thread there's also a robust book section members can have a look through here - https://www.outofthestorm.website/books-1 

Thanks for sharing this Kizzie! I'm going to have a good gander of it later.

My own small recommendation, it's not a trauma related book but it has helped me overall with the acceptance of my emotions. 'The Happiness Trap' by Dr Russ Harris. I struggle with accepting low feelings a lot of the time, so far this book has been helping me to acknowledge them in a healthier way. But it's not directly related to PTSD so there may be some methods in there that won't work.

[Kizzie]

Tks for the suggestion Perplex.  I haven't read it but I see it's to do with Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) which is an approach used by some therapists to treat trauma. 

[bluepalm]

I've just finished reading a wonderful book that I don't think has yet been included here on this thread or in the books section.

The book is titled 'The Boy Who Was Raised as a Dog and other Stories from a Child Psychiatrist's Notebook - What Traumatized Children Can Teach Us About Loss, Love, and Healing', Basic Books, Revised and Updated Edition 2017, written by Bruce D Perry, MD, PhD, and Maia Szalavitz.

The book deals with how trauma affects a child's mind and how traumatized children can recover. Compelling stories of children who have been affected by different types of trauma make this book an absorbing reading experience and the clearly written explanations of the links between brain development and the timing of trauma, the effect of therapeutic interventions and the importance for healing of the love, touch and support that can come from a strong relational community was revelatory for me.  Highly recommended.

bluepalm