Anyone have friends/partners in war zones --

  • 2 Replies


  • Member
  • 3
    • View Profile
Anyone have friends/partners in war zones --
« on: April 05, 2015, 08:25:15 PM »
My closest friend is a reporter working in the Middle East -- I also grew up in that area -- so it is always on my mind -- the country I grew up in is still home -- anyway, I find it very difficult to deal with the constant worry about her safety.  Have fears of ISIS/AQAP, etc. snatching her -- anyone else with friends, relatives, partners away in war torn areas?



  • Member
  • 26
    • View Profile
Re: Anyone have friends/partners in war zones --
« Reply #1 on: June 24, 2015, 04:56:36 PM »
Hi Ari,

I notice you wrote this in April- has your friend now returned?

When I first met my SO he was due to go out to the middle East on military service- in some ways I think I was attracted (partly) to the familiarity that this absence and anxiety  triggered in me. He has been several times since and our life is always a little unsettled. My therapist thinks I have been repeating previous trauma - when i became more aware of it, I went through a phase of feeling really upset and felt that I'm destined to a life of misery and triggering but my therapist re-framed it that maybe I'm destined to work through what happened to me. It does get easier every time and has made us stronger I think.

Was your friend going away similar for you? How did you manage?


Dutch Uncle

  • Member
  • 2108
  • Slowly freeing myself of a burden.
    • View Profile
Re: Anyone have friends/partners in war zones --
« Reply #2 on: June 24, 2015, 05:15:02 PM »
Yes Ari, I have.

I just made a post about my own (brief) experiences in that region and how it may affect me now.

I have friends there. Family even, in their view. You probably know how 'easy' you get to become 'family' there.
Such a different way of dealing with 'family'-bonds they have there, from a 'western' perspective. (And I am a 'Westerner').

I was 'adopted' so to speak.
My extended-adopted family is safe. Displaced though, but thankfully outside the war-torn country itself.

Many others, co-workers, acquaintances, friendly shop-keepers etc. etc… I don't know.
The constant reporting on the violence in the region is heartbreaking. Seeing the destruction, the death. Many places I went for leisure are now turned into rubble. It's hard to watch the pictures or video's of it.
I tend to look away, but sometimes I just need to see it. Witness it.
Can't take my eyes of it.
And always, I do not see the destruction, but I see those who I have known. And I realize how much they must suffer.

The helplessness I experience is the worst of all.
And there is no end in sight.

I wish for your friend's healthy return.

Take care.