So much of your post I can relate to C! Like not ascribing to what others consider the mandated way of doing things, what are the most important things to others? They are as you say, things I LIKE? But they are not the be all and end all of my existence.
For example, my sister and her best friend spend a tremendous amount of time discussing what they have bought, what they plan to buy and what they would like to buy. And it drives me insane. With both of them, many times, I have tried to discuss feelings and thoughts and beliefs. They treat like I am crazy. And BOTH of them then accuse me of thinking, believing and feeling things I do not. So I am no contact with both. We just can't understand each other at all. I suspect they are both N's. They are very superficial people. But I totally get that feeling of being different and we are. And we like ourselves anyway.
Also that feeling of being in rebellion a bit towards your parents. I also get that. For example mine are big on organized religion. I shun organized religion. I feel like I am a spiritual person? With a deep connection to God, who soothes and blesses me? But I cannot do organized religion. Too many bad memories associated, with the bulk of it being my father's utter hypocrisy. Watching an abuser for years and years, trying to lead and teach others about Christ's love just turns my stomach. So I understand the rebellion part, and I pray God understands too. That He knows I do love Him, but I can't do religion per se.
Anyway good thought provoking post C! Thank you!