Newbie Hello

[BeHea1thy]

Greetings members,

Pete Walker recommended this site. I trust that there are many things I can learn.

In the last 45 years, I've relentlessly pursued my recovery from toxic behavior I endured which was hidden behind a socially accepted facade of normalcy. Sometimes I get tired, discouraged and take a break, but always go back to pursuing the seemingly impossible task of healing. I don't give up.

I look forward to getting to know you. Thanks for being open and sharing what works, and what may not.

[Rain]

Welcome, BeHealthy.     

How good to hear that Pete Walker recommended this forum to you.   There are many motivated people here on the Journey to healing, and I'm glad you are hopefully joining us.

I look forward to hearing more of your 45 year Journey, what has worked for you, what you are working on now, etc.   Please do read Kizzie's Welcome post.

Grace and Healing in Your Journey!     

Rain

[Kizzie]

Hi BeHealthy - so glad Pete directed you to our site    You'll find that we discuss his work quite a bit so hopefully you will feel comfortable fairly quickly. 

I hear what you're saying about the weight of keeping the facade in place.  Many of us here are struggling to find our authentic selves  so you will find a lot of information, support and encouragement for the rest of your journey.

[spryte]

"I don't give up"

It's funny, the two sides of our coins...how we've gotten to the point in our roads where we just kind of sat down like..."Can't do it anymore" and the other side which is our amazing resiliency. I guess I've been wondering for years why I wasn't as resilient as others were...but I guess I must have been to have gotten this far...and like you BeHealthy, I just refuse to give up. I've fallen down countless times, but I always get back up.

It's pretty awesome to be in a place with other people who are fighters like me. Most people who I know have "issues" complain about them and I'm like, "What are you doing about that? How are you going about fixing that?" and they just look at me like I'm crazy.


Welcome!

[Rrecovery]

Hi and Welcome BH,

I've been actively pursuing my recovery for 30 years.  It keeps getting better.  Lately I've experienced some days where there were no symptoms of trauma and life just felt easy and cool.  How about that? 

I think one of the great mysteries is why do some people stay stuck in unhappiness and dysfunction while others scale mountains of pain daily to get to "better"?  It seems to me that there is something heroic about the latter. 

[Rrecovery]

We are heros every one

[Kizzie]

    

[Badmemories]

@ Behealthy,

I have actually solved the mystery you are talking about, at least for me. Some people have capacity for change and for enduring self examination, and some people shirk from it, opting instead for the familiarity of painful dysfunction. Yup, heroic fits and courageous too! 

Definitely a truth...

[spryte]

Invisible Hero's

http://blogs.psychcentral.com/childhood-neglect/2014/10/are-you-an-invisible-hero/

[Rrecovery]

Greetings members,

Pete Walker recommended this site. I trust that there are many things I can learn.

In the last 45 years, I've relentlessly pursued my recovery from toxic behavior I endured which was hidden behind a socially accepted facade of normalcy. Sometimes I get tired, discouraged and take a break, but always go back to pursuing the seemingly impossible task of healing. I don't give up.

I look forward to getting to know you. Thanks for being open and sharing what works, and what may not.

Hi BeHealthy and Welcome!

Your intro touched me, very much.  I have been in recovery for similar issues for 30 years.  It does get tiring doesn't it?  Bravo on 45 years of courage, perseverance and the tenacity to claim your right to wellness, wholeness and happiness.

Rr

[Kizzie]

Wow, the Invisible Hero link brought tears to my eyes.  Tks for that Spryte.

BeHealthy - My FOO had that whole "facade of normalcy" thing going too - still do. My NPDM makes sure about that - iron fisted about anything that may disturb the image in spite of all evidence to the contrary, it's quite the mindf*** when you look at it closely.   

Personally I think that's why it took me decades to find my way to OOTF.   What a tug of war it has been - "Is it is me or is it them?"  I knew it was them later on, but I didn't really have anything clearcut to hold up and wondered if anyone would believe me. I would get into therapy, open my mouth and out would come "Gak"! I just didn't know how to put into words what I was experiencing as it was (then anyways) quite subtle.

That has changed with OOTF and now OOTS, boy do I have the words now lol 

[Rrecovery]

I too was very touched by the Invisible Heros article. Thank you Spryte