Today I realized that ...... (Part 2)

[AphoticAtramentous]

This so called friend of mine has actually been guilt tripping me for months. For whatever reason I wasn't able to notice it at the time, would feel the emotional flashback but not know where it was coming from. Only now have I realised what he's been doing, and it makes me feel a lot better about wanting to withdraw from him.

Regards,
Aphotic.

[Blueberry]

Good for you Aphotic! Great self-protection

[AphoticAtramentous]

Thank you, Blueberry!
Today I also realised that I can tell I can potentially identify an ongoing EF based on the tightness and pain in my jaw. When I lived with my FOO, my muscles were always so tense that I developed TMJD (temporomandibular joint disorder) which physically locked my jaw/mouth from being able to open any more than a centimetre. Thankfully I don't deal with such dysfunction currently, but any jaw tightness serves as a good reminder to ground myself and try to loosen up a little - lest I get TMJD again!
Perfect example of "The Body Keeps the Score" I suppose?

Regards,
Aphotic.

[Maria S]

...I have so many good things in my life.

My kid is a sweetie. My ex and his daughter are loving and loyal. My friends, colleagues, church people and neighbours are genuine and kind. My volunteer job is the most happy-making I have ever had. I have a house, food, health insurance, a disability subsidy I can live of, a city that is reasonably safe.

In all my social connections I dare be me. And know people who are real. 

My family hates me. Or maybe they project things on me they hate. They don't even know who I am. But I guess I can't force them to love me. Or even to see who I really am.