Back from vacation

Started by Dyess, September 21, 2015, 06:06:37 PM

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Dyess

Back from vacation, it went okay. Did a lot of fishing, which was good in that I didn't have to communicate with people too much? The time went by so fast and that I hardly believe it happened. Though the sunburn and massive piles of things to unpack tells a different story. Everything is the same here, except one of the cats was totally devastated. She cried all day the first day back, I think she thought I was leaving her again. She's okay now, but keeps close tabs on where I'm at all the time. Falling back into my not wanting to leave the house, same ole same ole. I guess I was thinking the vacation would be a rejuvenating experience and some how I would come back feeling better. Didn't happen, my first day home I cried most of the day because I was back. With the cat and I both crying it was a pretty much gloom and doom day. Back to the grind of taking care of things here. The season is starting to change, leaves are falling and temps are cooler, I dread winter.

arpy1

welcome back Trace, i'm sorry it was a bit of a downer when you got back. but it sounds like it was a relaxing trip nonetheless. 

cats are such individuals, aren't they. one of my friends cats used to be totally cool with her being away, but her other one, (the girl, interestingly) used to go into a big snit whenever she returned from holidays, and pointedly ignore her for a week, as punishment for daring to be absent.  only when she felt she had been mean enough long enough, would she generously return to her normal cuddly self.

yeah, winter is coming here too. time to get the fairy lights and tinsel out. not for xmas (i am a humbug) but i put them up (in tastefully non seasonal displays i hasten to add!) when the days grow shorter becos they help with my need for LIGHT. i find i need light like i need food and drink. and colour.

anyway, i hope once the unpacked laundry is done and the sunburn soothed that you will start to regain your equilibrium and feel a bit better  :bighug:   and btw, it's nice to have you back   :bighug: :bighug:

Dutch Uncle

Welcome back Trace.  :thumbup:  I've been thinking of you.

I can relate to the unpacking. It usually takes me a week or so...
I wish you cuddly times with the cats on the couch.

:hug:

Dyess

Thanks arpy and DU, wish I could say I was happy to be back. Maybe it will get better in time.

arpy1


no_more_fear

Trace, glad that you're back with us. I totally relate to the feelings of being miserable at being home again after being away. I live very close to my FOO and when I go out, I'm miserable at the thought of coming back home again. I've retreated ever so slightly into self-isolation again because of the very thing you described, feeling so down on returning home. In a way it's almost better not to go out so that I don't have to deal with the terrible EF when I get home again. Plus, everytime I step outside I have an EF and extreme hypervigalence, which is extremely tolling.

How are you feeling now about being back? Have you settled into routine again? Hope you're doing OK.

Dyess

It's getting a little better. But like you said there is so many things here that trigger EF's. It's like falling into a well of darkness again. For three days I didn't go outside the house. Makes you wonder if leaving is even worth it.

no_more_fear

I think leaving is worth it, but in small doses. Choose where you want to go carefully, soo that you don't go out needlessly. I think you did the right thing by staying in for a few days-de-adrenailize for a while.

Dyess

It was a very hard 3 days though, a lot of sleeping and crying. It's up and down though. Some days are better than others. Dad's Death-iaversary is coming up in Oct. will be two years, already dreading that day.

Dutch Uncle

Quote from: Trace on September 26, 2015, 08:26:31 PM
Dad's Death-iaversary is coming up in Oct. will be two years, already dreading that day.
My condolences for your loss, Trace.  :'(
Did you take his ashes with you on your trip? (I recall you mentioned considering taking them, or am I wrong?)

:hug:

Dyess

Good memory :) Yes, had thought about it but the trip was already so stressful I knew this wasn't the right time. My garbage disposal went out, I replaced it, checked the connections but forgot to knock an internal dishwasher plug so my entire kitchen flooded. Then we got lost on the way, caused us another hour of driving, then the wind blew my car door open and scratched the door of the car beside me. I found the owner and he was okay with it. Then my friend broke her foot on the beach on our third day there. I started having some medical issues the day we got there, so it wasn't the best vacation.
So Dad still sits in the living room with me. Seems like a bad dream all that happening with him. I plan on releasing some balloons to heaven for him on his death-iversary.

Dutch Uncle

Quote from: Trace on September 27, 2015, 02:05:02 AM
I plan on releasing some balloons to heaven for him on his death-iversary.
:thumbup:

Take care, :hug:

no_more_fear

Trace, sorry to hear it's the anniversary of your Dad's death soon. I'll be thinking of you.  :hug: :hug: :hug:

Dyess

Thank you. When summer leaves it is always hard for me. But knowing dad's death date is coming up and the holidays it's very hard. I always spent the holidays with dad.