Feeling *unable* to work / job hunt

[Sesame]

I can relate. For a long time, I felt like I was absolutely worthless and had nothing to offer. I do not have the degree and only some flimsy qualifications. Add to that I keep following my husband to a foreign country all the time and the idea of an interview not in my native language... with a GROUP of interviewers... I was terrified. The interview was the most frightening part of it for me. Writing and sending applications made me feel embarrassed, but at least I could send it off and never look at it again. An interview, on the other hand, meant going into a room with multiple strangers and being analysed and judged by them on whether I was good enough to be given a job. The kind of situation that could trigger me easily and would be burnt into my memory for a long time, especially if it all went downhill.

Is there anything you can do online, or from home, or maybe something with little interaction with people? Enough that you can work on becoming more comfortable, but not so much you are constantly triggered? I was lucky enough to end up in such an environment, but my situation is probably very different from yours.

You know, I don't know if it will help, but maybe the interview is also your chance to see if there are people there that you would be comfortable working with. Are they good enough to make you comfortable working there? I am sure there are some people at my workplace who think I'm weird, but there are also plenty of people who, despite not knowing, treat me with kindness, respect and understanding. People like that make it a lot easier and give you a confidence boost. I don't need to care so much about those who judge me negatively because I have so much support everywhere else.