Concentration and memory problems

[Boatsetsailrose]

Hi
I suffer fairly bad concentration and memory problems and I've been putting them down to anti dep..
Now I am coming off it and I wonder if the problems I have are more cptsd related -

I am recognising that fear puts my mind in another place where I can't be present - it's really frustrating me -
I am trying to learn to drive and my work is affected too

Memory is crap esp short term - it seems everyone around me is functioning normally ( that may be true and it may not
I have to write everything down

Do u have experience of this ?
What do u attribute it to ?
Any solutions ?

Best wishes 🌸🌿

[Indigochild]

Hi Boatsetsailrose

It could be dissociation. You can forget too when you are stressed. Forget where you put things, what just happened, what they just said...etc.
Don't know if meds ruin a persons ability to have good short term memory at all.
Do you have long term memory gaps u dont remember?

[Boatsetsailrose]

No long term ok
I feel it's more the cptsd regarding it being a psychological disorder and an anxiety disorder
I'm just noticing how my mind focuses on worry and not the task in hand - also the social anxiety over loading -
Stress part of cptsd doesn't seem to be discussed that much ( or maybe I've been missing it -

May be dis association sometimes yes thank u for pointing out - I'm just learning what that looks like in me

So much to learn - I feel overwhelmed with life at the moment -
Work - driving lessons - recovery - eating disorder management -
Gee need to breathe -
Still have such a perfectionist drive wanting to play in me - glad I can recognise that today - balance with fun
Fireworks tonight

[seriousann333]

I also have memory and concentration problems. Which is why I drink coffee, but not too much because it can increase anxiety. I was prescribed a low dose of Adderol for my extreme ADD symptoms. It has been very helpful for the brain fog and depression etc. Only drawback is if I take too much it can make anxiety worse. I stick to my dosage, make sure I time it well , drink lots of water, exercise every day and eat well. For me I have to stick to a consistent wellness plan.
Additionally, it's a debate within myself if I have CPTSD only or CPTSD and ADHD. ADHD seems to show up with the brain fog, occasional racing thoughts, some impulsivity. I interrupt people because I can figure out what they're going to say before they say it. I am impatient sometimes and restless as evidenced by pen clicking and toe tapping. I like to stand and pace when I talk which makes interactions challenging. I so badly want to blurt out why I have to move and fidget. But fear repercussions.

[Boatsetsailrose]

Hi serious ann 333
Thanks for sharing ah add never thought of that I'll google it
Re cptsd and adhd they present differently though don't they ? Or are u finding similarities ?

[tired]

I was about to post on this. I have trouble concentrating and reading and I have a bad memory.  It could be my terrible diet.  It could be my preoccupation with all my anxieties.  It takes an enormous amount of emotional energy to avoid all the things we avoid.  Trying not to think about painful things is a full time job for the brain.

I have attention problems and calling it add to me sounds weird. I mean it would be pretty strange if I could pay attention.  If you had a brain tumor would you wonder why you get headaches. 

Cptsd for me is like a whole mess of cancer all over that can cause pretty much anything.

I remember having ocd symptoms as a child and I remember having trouble concentrating because of problems at home.  I don't remember ever not having this problems so I don't think I can attribute it to meds or diet . 

I'm super depressed right now and I had too much to eat and that makes it worse. I'm looking at what I'm writing and it's disjointed and weird to me.  I'm here now  because I don't think I can stay on task with anything right now but this is hard too.

[seriousann333]

Boatsetsailrose.
Great question. I have been diagnosed with both PTSD and ADHD. PTSD was diagnosed first, later in life (I was frozen and numb to my childhood until my 30's). I was also  assessed for ADHD and met the criteria. I likely fit in the inattentive type. I'm reporting on what I know about myself. I honestly feel like I have both but they show up depending on my mood and life circumstances.
CPTSD shows up when I'm triggered, my symptoms include: paranoia, mild, magical yet manageable psychosis, insomnia, persecutory thoughts and anger. Once this stage is managed it evolves into detachment, feeling guarded and depressed.  Then my mood can shift to more ADHD symptoms especially when I'm rested: impulsivity, abstract and silly humor, quick wit, extreme creative thoughts and drive, impatience, passionate drive, tendancy to interrupt, becoming overwhelmed with visual and auditory stimuli (in a good way, being fascinated alternating with being bored and not intellectually challenged, alternating with brain fog, memory and concentration problems, struggle to form coherent sentences when tired and irritability.
People may disagree but I feel I have both.
Not everyone is the same. Some may have PTSD only and have memory and concentration problems.

[tired]

My symptoms are similar and it's very confusing to me.  I'm also confused by the effects of Ritalin which are not very clear cut and predictable but overall it helps.

[Boatsetsailrose]

Indeed - diagnosis can be so helpful -
And disorders do over lap -
I mean a bunch of symptoms gets called a name by someone and then gives us a frame work
Horray for diagnosis and identification
Not that I have any diagnosis but finding cptsd and being able to fit my symptoms into a framework had been such a revelation for me -
Re the concentration and memory probs -
I'm nearly
Off the anti dep and am less sedated -
And I'm getting to be able to
Concentrate a bit better
I def think anxious brain is a real prob although I can see am getting a bit more control these days over my mind and that is great 🌝🌿

[tired]

weird coincidence-i was at starbucks getting a skinny vanilla venti latte and i said to the lady, "i'm surprised i could even remember all those words" and we starting talking about remembering words etc. She said her son was in high school and he wasn't doing his chores while she was at work and she thought he was being lazy. turned out he had short term memory loss as a result of ptsd from the loss of his dad years earlier.  i said i think i have that too. it was just after i read this thread.

today i got a new script of ritalin and i was trying to figure out if it helped or not.  i keep doing this thing where i can't remember or don't know what exercise to do  next, and i think of one and my brain says maybe that's a bad idea, but i do it anyway. it's as if my brain can't work fast enough to make the right decision. or my brain is so self conscious it's distracted. is it possible to be too focused? so much focus / ritalin that instead of just flowing through tasks you hyperfocus on everything you do to the point of being disabled?  all you do is think about what you're doing? dunno. confused.

[Indigochild]

Are you sure your long term memory is ok Boatsetsailrose?
I mean, i have good long term memory- or so i thought-
a lot of stuff that happened only a few years ago i dont remember.
Some stuff i do really well from the past- painful stuff and normal things even, i just dont remember.

When we are stressed we  are forgetful, when having flashbacks we are disassociated from the present.
Have you read about the Freeze Type- Pete Walker?

I know recovery can look like so much, it freaks me out too, but i hope everything went well with the other stuff, and that you had a good bombfire night.

[Boatsetsailrose]

Hi yes my long term memory is excellent -
I think I put too much pressure on myself ( no surprise there )
I work as a nurse it is information overload and I beat myself for not remembering everything ( perfectionism ) and I compare myself to others ( sometimes 20yrs younger than me -

I'm good enough that's what I am best to remember and I do a good enough job (the 

[Indigochild]

Such a shame Boatsetsailrose that you beat yourself up like that and feel u have to be perfect all the time.
Do you think its possible to remember what happened with trauma? it is, isn't it! either remembering too much and painfully or not much at all.

[Boatsetsailrose]

I don't appear to have any block on remembering trauma -
HavE had yrs of intense therapy
I know why the self hatred / non acceptance happens - it doesn't change it by knowing why ....

Self compassion is my best tool

[Boatsetsailrose]

PS
I don't mean to cause offence but ....

I really dislike being asked questions on here - for me it feels like it goes into a therapy type relating -
I really get a lot from people sharing their experience and I can share mine without anyone making it structured

Not to say I've not been guilty of asking others questions too - it reminds me to stop doing it as well -

Peer to peer sharing feels the best and equal