New intention - connect with more functional people

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Boatsetsailrose

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New intention - connect with more functional people
« on: November 27, 2015, 07:06:04 AM »
I seem to have finally reached a place where I feel more functional and together -
*note not 'fixed' just another layer of recovery

I have sent an intention 'to connect with more functional people as friends ' this doesn't necessarily mean people who have no issues I mean 'who doesn't ' that's what I'm realising but people who have awareness and working on themselves

I feel done with making friends with co dependence issues - I can see this is because I've had / can still have my own issues with this area - but I now have made a promise that I seek more functional relating -
I don't want to control I don't want to be controlled
I don't want others to cling - I don't want to cling
Having a foundation of 'who I am - and the other having that too
Not being subservient and visa versa -

Two souls meet - as equals - dance and be happy
Struggles yes - but able to own and manoeuvre without projection

Happy healthy conscious 💓✨

All experiences / welcome
Ps pllease don't ask me questions ( this is triggering for me )
Kind regards

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Dutch Uncle

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Re: New intention - connect with more functional people
« Reply #1 on: November 27, 2015, 08:10:46 AM »
Excellent intention, and I wish you much luck and stamina.  :thumbup:
« Last Edit: November 27, 2015, 08:24:49 AM by Dutch Uncle »

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Boatsetsailrose

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Re: New intention - connect with more functional people
« Reply #2 on: November 27, 2015, 09:03:09 PM »
Thank you Dutch uncle 😀✨

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Flutterbye

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Re: New intention - connect with more functional people
« Reply #3 on: May 09, 2016, 08:39:03 AM »
I agree, nice intention. but have found intentions provide only temporary uplift, need to put them into action otherwise they are just academic & intellectualising. What does someone new have to offer? important question because I want to avoid repeating abuse dynamic of my past with new friends/people/dates where I never asked that & assumed I should bring everything to the table. Found I swang to the other extreme, expecting new people to be less damaged & higher functioning than me, to want to befriend, reassure, connect with, protect, mentor, parent, protect, keep company with... me. Found that is not possible. New people want to sleep with me. If they didn't want that, new people want to burden me with their problems without offering support in return. learning about give & take, is  complex & 2-way. If you met a new person, liked them & they said, 'don't ask me any questions, it's triggery," would you be able to continue with the relationship/friendship? only way to feel benefits of new intention is real life practice, see what new people are out there to meet me when I was finally ready to take the plunge minus self-sacrifice. I like people higher functioning & less damaged than me, I feel good in their company.. that's nice for me but is that on offer? it can't all be about me & my needs, that's just role reversal of the past (I was the one meeting all the other person's needs & getting none of my needs met), what do I have to offer them?