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Drew

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New Member
« on: May 30, 2016, 12:52:34 AM »
Hi,

I'm a new member here. I'm not so good with forums and such (not being heard is a trigger of mine), but I'm hoping to learn and hopefully help myself.

Currently in therapy with a county worker who hasn't diagnosed me with anything. I'm not sure if he can or cannot depending on law, but I've done a fair bit of research on my own and I fit a large portion of the diagnostic lists I've seen. I'm coming to terms with even the fact that I was abused (I can't seem to remember any specifics) and it's been incredibly painful and disheartening so far.

Thanks for reading.

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radical

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Re: New Member
« Reply #1 on: May 30, 2016, 02:41:53 AM »
Hi Drew,
Welcome.
Not feeling heard can be triggering if it has been a pattern in your life.
I can tend to feel triggered by feeling unworthy of attention and insignificant, not important enough, I guess.

My mother, in her blithe, not really noticing me way, kind of acknowledged that I was invisible as a child when she said of someone else: (something like) "He still has problems because he was overlooked as a child, like Radical was".
Radical was in the room and astonished.  The problems in the family went way beyond me being overlooked, but it's the only acknowledgment I've ever had, or probably will ever get from her.
(I thought I was getting the silent treatment from her for months sometimes, but I suspect that after the initial hostility, it was partly that she clean forgot I existed.)

I hope you are able to feel supported here.  There are not many people around a lot of the time, and we all have our own particular 'things'.  Don't take it personally if people don't respond to something you say.  It happens to most, I think.  I just think of it as journalling if no-one  responds to what I have written.  I still get value from reading what others are talking about.

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mourningdove

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Re: New Member
« Reply #2 on: May 30, 2016, 05:01:08 AM »
Welcome, Drew!  :hug:

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Drew

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Re: New Member
« Reply #3 on: May 30, 2016, 05:55:11 PM »
Hi Drew,
Welcome.
Not feeling heard can be triggering if it has been a pattern in your life.
I can tend to feel triggered by feeling unworthy of attention and insignificant, not important enough, I guess.

My mother, in her blithe, not really noticing me way, kind of acknowledged that I was invisible as a child when she said of someone else: (something like) "He still has problems because he was overlooked as a child, like Radical was".
Radical was in the room and astonished.  The problems in the family went way beyond me being overlooked, but it's the only acknowledgment I've ever had, or probably will ever get from her.
(I thought I was getting the silent treatment from her for months sometimes, but I suspect that after the initial hostility, it was partly that she clean forgot I existed.)

I hope you are able to feel supported here.  There are not many people around a lot of the time, and we all have our own particular 'things'.  Don't take it personally if people don't respond to something you say.  It happens to most, I think.  I just think of it as journalling if no-one  responds to what I have written.  I still get value from reading what others are talking about.
Thanks. I hope I feel supported here too. I just needed to dip my toe in. Will be checking things out over the next couple weeks. Never really been in a support group, so it's all new to me. Thank you for the welcome and words of wisdom.

Welcome, Drew!  :hug:
Thank you!

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Dutch Uncle

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Re: New Member
« Reply #4 on: May 31, 2016, 11:34:50 AM »
Hi Drew  :wave:  and welcome to Out of the Storm.  :hug:

I'm a new member here. I'm not so good with forums and such (not being heard is a trigger of mine), but I'm hoping to learn and hopefully help myself.
As hard as it is, this is the most important part of recovery: acknowledging it is us who can help ourselves. In fact, we have done this. Part of recovery is accepting we always did, despite the adversary.  :yes:

I hope you are able to feel supported here.  There are not many people around a lot of the time, and we all have our own particular 'things'.  Don't take it personally if people don't respond to something you say.  It happens to most, I think.  I just think of it as journalling if no-one  responds to what I have written.  I still get value from reading what others are talking about.
:yeahthat:

Yet some of the most satisfying moments come when a reply comes some time after you have shared your experiences, thoughts, feelings.

Welcome again, Drew.
Looking forward to see you around.

 :hug:
Dutch.