Today I feel ...... (Part 3)

Started by Kizzie, June 13, 2016, 06:17:25 PM

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radical

Reaching out my hand across cyberspsace (there's no emoticon for that).  Take care, Mourningdove :hug:


Wife#2

Hopeful.

And that is almost ridiculous. The heat pump is getting old, the van is in the shop (no idea how much THAT will cost), work is difficult these days, my body is revealing all my stress, my husband is needy, my son is struggling and hating school, and symptoms are indicating that I am seriously dehydrated.

Still, I woke up this morning, got my shower, got a reluctant 8-year-old ready, made his lunch, made hubby's coffee, let the dogs out then back in, lost my temper, apologized, got son and me out the door and into the car. And, for some unknown reason, hopefulness washed over me. Seeing the full moon, knowing it's Friday the 13th (a thing that never bothered me anyway) and knowing I had a long day ahead of me didn't diminish that hopefulness.

I wish I could explain it. I wish I could share it. So, I figured I'd come here and share with everyone that I am having a good day. I hope and pray that you will also have a good day. :hug:

mourningdove

Thanks, radical and Three Roses  :hug:  :hug:

Happy for you today, Wife#2  :hug:


sanmagic7

mourningdove, that's a show of the greatness and strength of your heart that you can be happy for someone else who is feeling the exact opposite of you. 

this world right now, the uncertainty, the economics, what will happen after jan. 20 in the u.s., what is happening here in mexico - i don't blame you for being scared.  i am, too.  it's a horrible feeling based on the reality of what's going on, and everything that's led up to it.  i've got a hand out to you, too.

wife2, hang on to that hopefulness.  i am able to share some of that right now, and it feels good, weird, but good. 

all i know is that i have some terrific support here, and i'm grateful for it.  the rest of the future will have to take care of itself.   i can't battle that beast anymore. 

mourningdove


sanmagic7

today i'm so mad because my hub kept waking me up during the night.  i've been working on my sleeping, had a couple good nights and good naps, and that always makes me feel better.  so, along with feeling mad, i'm also feeling a bit sickish from having such terrible interrupted sleep all night.  grrrr and ugh!


rosemarie

Hey sanmagic,

Just wanted to save having sleep interrupted is the worst. My dog has been doing this it's making me feel exhausted and annoyed. But that's probably a bit easier because she is so adorable it's impossible to stay mad at her. Still sorry you had a rough night. Hope you can take good care of yourself and get some extra rest today!

courage

Everything hurts today. Haven't seen my therapist in a while, and I feel like I never wanna go back. I feel as if I'll be broken forever. I feel like nobody's ever gonna love me, because every time I show someone how broken I am, they run away.

sanmagic7

thanks, rose.  yeah, i think we're going for separate beds.  we've been down this road before, and i'm thinking we're just not compatible sleepers!  it may seem weird, but i've never had this many problems with others.

courage, your name says it all.  i sincerely hope you get through this phase as quickly as possible.  i've been where you are, several times and it sucks.  however, i've also made it out, every time, and i'm wishing that for you.  the one phrase that's helped me, and i know it sounds kind of cliche', is 'this, too, shall pass'.  i've had to hang onto that one as a lifeline at times.  big hug.

sanmagic7

today i feel happy.  i have discovered a small, soft, shining bit of happiness, finally, within myself, and i've been feeling it for about 2 weeks and it feels lovely.

i'm also feeling happy for both a friend and my hub.  she has battle cancer last year, had to cancel going to her favorite tennis tournament, but is packing to be able to attend it next week.  i am so happy for her, i'm nearly overflowing.  it didn't look like she'd ever be able to attend it again, yet here she is.  i think it's the best medicine for her.  she's been through *.

my hub left this morning to go whale watching down the baja peninsula.  it is quite an adventure and i'm so happy that he's getting to do it, especially since he'll be with a dear friend and they'll be able to share the experience together.  i'm so happy to see him excited like a little kid at christmas.  like he says, it made my heart rumble and roll like a puppy. 

feeling happy is a really good feeling.  i'm glad i've lived long enough to experience it.

mourningdove


sanmagic7

there is a smile on my face, mourningdove.  thanks for that!

Wife#2

San - Heart rumble & roll like a puppy... what a wonderful way to express real happiness! I hope that is continuing, along with good sleep while he's away!

Courage - I know it's been a month, are you getting any relief from the body pains? I've been thinking of you and hoping that your pain is at least less than it had been.  ::: gentle hug :::

writetolife

Anxious and frustrated. 

Like the kind of anxious when you're at work and realizing that parts of your face are starting to get numb.  Like the kind of anxious when you feel like your legs won't support you. 

The kind of frustrated when you know that someone won't listen to you, doesn't care about what you say, and will never change.