Happy self-fathering Day

[Dutch Uncle]

It's Father's Day where I live.
This year, I will devote the celebrations to something I need to learn and/or appreciate better for the times I already do this and have done this: Self-Fathering.
As Pete Walker has put it:

"Reparenting is a key aspect of relational healing. It is primarily a process of addressing the many developmental arrested needs of the traumatized child we were." (p.57)

"Many abandoned children enter adulthood feeling that the world is a dangerous place where they are ill-equipped to defend themselves. Self-fathering heals the wounds of being helpless to protect yourself from parental abuse, and by extension from other abusive authority figures. Self-fathering aims at building assertiveness and self-protection. It includes learning to effectively confront external and/or internal abuse. Many survivors benefit greatly from classes and books on assertiveness training." (p.62)

Have a good day y'all! 

[Jdog]

Dutch-

A very happy Self Fathering Day to you, as well!  The lines you quote from Pete Walker indeed do carry a powerful and important message about learning to be our own best protectors, despite early lack of protection from our fathers.  It is a message I need to internalize, as I have dreaded Fathers Day ever since the loss of my own Dad in 1982.

Many thanks, once again.

[Rainydaze]

I self-fathered too, Dutch Uncle!  I refused to spend time buying my NF a present he wouldn't appreciate for a day that doesn't particularly apply to bad fathers, so instead I just chose him a neutral card and bought myself a box of chocolates.