Panic attacks?

[Alice97]

For quite some time now I wake up with anxiety attacks of some sort every morning, and sometimes when I'm triggered throughout the day. Sometimes they last all day, sometimes they go away in a few minutes. I start breathing very shallowly, my heart beats irregularly, I feel like it's hard to swallow, I dissociate, and tremble, twitch, and shake. I can hide it most of the time so people think I'm relaxed, but the attacks make it very difficult to get through the day. So anyways I'm wondering if it's normal to be able to hide the attack? I guess I always thought panic attacks are obvious and make the person feel like they are dying. But then I googled my symptoms the other day and they matched with panic attacks. Except I don't really feel like I'm panicking in those moments. Oftentimes I don't even know what triggers it. I'm not "worried" about anything in particular. It's more just my body is panicking and my brain is dissociating and I am somewhere far away feeling nothing. I'd really appreciate any light you can shed on this for me.

[Three Roses]

Yes, that sounds like anxiety attacks. Mine can come at the drop of a hat, without warning - hyperventilating, heart racing, instant headache, dizzy, dissociated. Other times there's a feeling like, "Uh oh, that feels like panic starting," and I can take steps to avoid or delay it.

On the plus side, I haven't had one in quite a while.

[Danaus plexippus]

Dear Three Roses,

Will you please fill us in on these steps to take to avoid or delay attacks of anxiety/panic? 

[Three Roses]

http://www.everydayhealth.com/pictures/how-to-end-an-anxiety-attack/#01

However, sometimes these don't work. Sometimes the best I can do is ride it out.

[sweetsixty]

Hi guys,

Sorry to butt in, I've been a member a while but I tend to lurk a lot as I often feel very exposed if no one answers my posts lol. It tends to give me flashbacks by itself as it makes me feel like people are staring but not responding and I feel as if I was naked in front of you.  But that's the shame part of CPTSD kicking in.  Wow, there I said it, that's a big thing for me to do in an open forum.

I just wanted to ask does  anyone ever have a panic attack that skips the chest pain, short of breath etc and just feels like an adrenalin rush of fear coursing through your whole system until you feel faint? It's an actual physical feeling that makes the hairs on your arms and back of your next stand up!

Can't make up my mind if it's a panic attack or an emotional flashback related to fear? I've just posted on the Emotional Flashbacks page about how this happens to me a lot when I'm ill. Which is not good as I tend to be ill a lot as I have MS plus other issues.

Thanks for any responses

[Three Roses]

Yes! Those are so uncomfortable (which doesn't seem a close enough word - terrifying? exhausting?)

The hair on my neck bristles and suddenly I've got to flee from whatever is chasing me. It's hard to stay calm and force myself to walk, and not look behind me find my pursuer.

[Danaus plexippus]

yes, I get that. It feels like something large and horrible is breathing down the back of my neck and just about to bite my head off.

[sweetsixty]

Ooo that's really horrible, no I don't get a feeling as though something is breathing down my neck it's just an actually fully fledged fear feeling, I can feel the adrenalin rush through my body.

Is this an EF so you think? It's every time I'm ill which is not good when you have chronic illnesses!

Thanks guys for not ignoring me (((hugs)))

[papillon]

Hey Alice, sorry you're experiencing this.

You're not alone. I also wake up most mornings to varying degrees of anxiety. Sometimes an all-out panic-attack. Sometimes just an elevated heart rate and trouble breathing. This is all moments after opening my eyes while I'm still in bed. Should be a peaceful time. 

Changing my morning routines frequently sometimes helps. Throwing on music. Getting up immediately. Watching a Periscope broadcast. Talking to the dog. Reading a page of whatever book is on my nightstand.

It tends to be worse if I drift off to sleep thinking about anything unpleasant. That returns as my first thought and... 

[Contessa]

Hi Alice97,

I always thought panic attacks and anxiety attacks were different, and just as you described. Anxiety is extremely uncomfortable, and panic brings on feelings of imminent death. I've read up a little on this but don't want to go into fully fledged research mode to avoid (over) self diagnosis. Though a psychiatrist or two mentioned panic attack which I didn't agree too.

Thank you for the link Three Roses, some good ideas there. Sweetsixty I have read your posts with interest! Keep them coming Like you i'm not sure how to categorise my physical responses yet. One day i'll know!

In general, I was having anxiety upon waking up recently (and in the past at stressful times), and I tell myself now that this is just a burst of cortisol to wake me up. It is horrible, and I hate waking up when this happens, but I just put it down to a chemical reaction that won't last long. I was finding recently though, it was worse when going to bed late at night.

[sweetsixty]

Yes I'm sorry Alice 97 that I burst in on  your thread. I just wanted to add that feeling anxious as soon as you wake up has been one of mine too in the past.

I've been working with a wonderful T for several years, she now only sees me once every 3 months to make sure I'm still on the right road and to deal with anything that is occurring. But her advice every time, is inner child work.  I've said on here before how we worked with imagery and in that imagery we 'rescued' some images of a younger me and brought them back to the present. She's told me to work on each of the younger me's as they each represent a particular age but also a particular emotion that has become 'locked' in time and has followed me all my life. Like fear, shame, guilt, etc.

Warning: this is very hard work, emotionally draining and at times feels overwhelming. But over time some of my somatic symptoms are gradually weakening. They've not gone but I don't go into full blown panic / anxiety whatever it's called as often.

One of my 'tricks' is to work with a three year old me and to picture me giving her a hug every morning as soon as I wake and every night before I go to sleep. It can be very calming to tell your inner child she is safe and loved. Just saying the words can be overwhelming but if you do it regularly it's less so and more comforting.

Contessa, thank you so much for acknowledging me, I have this dread of being totally ignored as it triggers me into feeling people are disgusted with me. I posted over on emotional flashbacks thread a few days ago and no one even replied yet which is why I hijacked this one before I ran scared again. I've been a member on here since the start but still find it hard to deal with if no one replys and I retreat for months each time.  So a huge thank you for reaching out. Somatic memories are often the hardest to deal with.

[Contessa]

Not a problem Sweetsixty. We're all learning from each other and your input is as valuable as anyone elses.

[Three Roses]

Sweetsixty, I'd like to apologize to you for not responding to your other comment.  I'm sorry that you felt ignored and scared. 

You have such valuable insight! Your response on this thread had been very helpful to me.

Thanks for not running!

[sweetsixty]

Thanks Contessa and Three Roses if anything helps in only a small part it's worth it 

[Alice97]

Oops I can see I shouldn't have neglected this thread for so long. Sweetsixty - Don't worry about "butting in," I'm glad you asked your question here, so no worries And thanks to everyone who has responded, I feel like I understand my morning anxiety a lot better now.