The Body Keeps the Score

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movementforthebetter

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Re: The Body Keeps the Score
« Reply #60 on: September 30, 2016, 05:18:52 AM »
Chapter 8 is triggering, too. It deals mainly with childhood sexual abuse but touches on all child abuse. I don't have memories of any CSA before age 7, but I don't have memories of much else, either. And that has been a faint worry for a long time. And many of the symptoms described in this chapter are familiar despite my not having an autoimmune disease.

Not much else to say. I will wrap this one with an inspiring quote from the end of the chapter:

"I gradually came to realize that the only thing that makes it possible to do the work of healing trauma is awe at the dedication to survival that enabled my patients to endure their abuse and then endure the dark nights of the soul that inevitably occur on the road to recovery."

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movementforthebetter

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Re: The Body Keeps the Score
« Reply #61 on: October 01, 2016, 04:58:44 AM »
Chapter 9 again has my family's number. And I can see patterns emerging amongst different family members now. It's so sad and I'm trying to keep hopelessness at bay.

I took the ACE myself (http://www.acestudy.org/) and scored 9. I just didn't have a family member in prison, though my F was arrested. Based on what I've read I'm not sure how I've made it so far in as "good" a condition as I am. Which is functioning, with great difficulty.

This chapter explains the affect trauma in childhood has on adults later in life. And most of the outcomes, I identify with. I guess I'm blocking my emotions at the moment but I really need to stay present and feel them. I am so sad learning the things I am now. At first it was validating but right now I just think about generation upon generation that will not see the benefit of healing. Thankfully the tide is slowly turning.

"But when the ACE study data appeared on his computer screen, he realized that they had stumbled upon the most costly public health issue in the United States: child abuse. He had calculated that its overall costs exceeded those of cancer or heart disease and that eradicating child abuse in America would reduce the overall rate of depression by half, alcoholism by two-thirds, and suicide, IV drug use, and domestic violence by three-quarters. It would also increase workplace performance and vastly decrease the need for incarceration." (p.150)

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movementforthebetter

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Re: The Body Keeps the Score
« Reply #62 on: October 04, 2016, 04:46:47 AM »
Oh thank goodness, I finised the section on child developmental trauma. That was rough.

TRIGGERS in this post though, on several aspects of abuse.





Chapter 10

I think the revelation that genetics aren't fixed is a relatively common-sense one. We get viruses and diseases, and can suffer permanent damage to certain chemical exposures so to me it makes sense that social and environmental factors can also play a role. I was familiar with the rat pup study from McGill on p. 154. I think I may have heard about it on a podcast.
I am still blown away by how important that is, and the arrogance of man to not see the obvious connection to other mammals.

The fact that there is actual proof that poverty and abuse both leave distinct epigenetic profiles in children should be all that is needed to change society's priorities, but it is always the poor and vulnerable that lose out because they cannot advocate for themselves. One day we will look back collectively and be ashamed that this evidence was ignored.

"In the case of troubled children with histories of abuse and neglect who show up in clinics, schools, hospitals, and police stations, the traumatic roots of their behaviors are less obvious, particularly because they rarely talk about having been hit, abandoned, or molested, even when asked." (p.159)

This was validating to read. Part of me blamed myself for not speaking up the few times I had a real reason to. It's still so painful to think of the few times I was asked and I try hard not to think of what might've gone differently, because realistically it probably wouldn't have been any better if we had been taken away.

I won't list them all because it's too triggering, but of the physical problems listed on page 160, ten are ones I do or have struggled with.

"Having been frequently ignored or abandoned leaves them clinging and needy, even with the people who abused them. Having been chronically beaten, molested, and otherwise mistreated, they can't help but define themselves as worthless. They come by their self-loathing, sense of defectiveness, and worthlessness honestly. Was it any surprise they didn't trust anyone? Finally, the combination of feeling fundamentally despicable and overreacting to slight frustrations makes it difficult for them to make friends." (p.160)

This is my life, that I don't let anyone fully see, in one paragraph.

The facts are in, studies are there, the costs have been totalled and the damage tallied. I sincerely hope that the next "social justice" to gain traction is that of developmental trauma.


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Three Roses

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Re: The Body Keeps the Score
« Reply #63 on: December 11, 2016, 02:28:10 AM »
Reading thru this thread again - it's good to have a refresher on this book. :)

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Boatsetsailrose

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Re: The Body Keeps the Score
« Reply #64 on: December 11, 2016, 09:27:15 PM »
Such an interesting subject three roses
Thank u for posting ...
I find when I mindfully engage with another it certainly helps me 'get out of my angst ' but I have to be in the right mood i.e. Have enough inner resource ...
When I'm in ef / trigger I find it much much more difficult ... just feel so stunted ...

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Fen Starshimmer

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Re: The Body Keeps the Score
« Reply #65 on: February 15, 2017, 10:43:08 PM »
What a fascinating book. Thank you for all the excerpts. I can't wait to read it! Pity the audio has been taken down by Penguin.

It makes so much sense. I always knew many - if not most - of my symptoms originated in my body and were not the product of my mind, ie due to faulty thought processes or irrational thinking.

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Three Roses

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Re: The Body Keeps the Score
« Reply #66 on: April 18, 2018, 01:00:56 AM »
I've loaned my copy of this book to my son's new gf - she is a physician so I'm excited to hear what she thinks/thought of it. Hopefully they will be here this coming weekend.  :thumbup:

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Three Roses

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Re: The Body Keeps the Score
« Reply #67 on: September 26, 2018, 04:41:23 PM »
Coming back to this again... I echo what mftb has said, there are chapters that are rough to get thru, as they remove the confusion and highlight family dysfunction and the effects we then carry. But after that discouragement fades, I am left with insight into why I am the way I am, and validation. It really was as bad - or worse! - as I thought it was. I learned to minimize ("just don't think about it - forgiveness is the answer - it couldn't have been that bad - I'm sure they loved you - people make mistakes" - blah blah blah) and in doing so I threw away any motivation for self-examination and hope for change.

In the book "The Peaceful Warrior" one character says this -

"The secret of change is to focus all your energy not on fighting the old, but on building the new.”


This is my new mantra. Focus on what I want now, examine the past but only as a means to illuminate my path.

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Boatsetsailrose

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Re: The Body Keeps the Score
« Reply #68 on: September 26, 2018, 08:58:56 PM »
That is such a good mantra three roses
Who is the book by please?

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Three Roses

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Re: The Body Keeps the Score
« Reply #69 on: September 26, 2018, 11:41:27 PM »
Oops, my bad. I saw the movie, which was called The Peaceful Warrior; but the book is called "The Way of the Peaceful Warrior" and is by Dan Millman.

Keep reading for a little trivia about the quote from The Quote Investigator ..

Quote
The 2006 edition was titled “Way of the Peaceful Warrior: A Book that Changes Lives” and was released in conjunction with the movie. The text of the quotation in this edition was modified somewhat:

"Back in the office, Socrates drew some water from the springwater dispenser and put on the evening’s tea specialty, rose hips, as he continued. “To rid yourself of old patterns, focus all your energy not on struggling with the old, but on building the new.”

https://quoteinvestigator.com/2013/05/28/socrates-energy/