Healing the roots

[macandrui]

Here is some info about the root chakra. I'm inclined to think that when we want to hide from the trauma, it's the eyes and the anus that shut tightly. Perhaps part of recovery is letting them open gently and trusting that now we are the ones taking care of us, and those that hurt us when they should have cared for us cannot touch us now.


http://wheelsoflight.org/custom/index.cfm?ID=218102

The Root Chakra begins its development during the ages 0-7 years.  Any verbal, mental, physical abuse or lack of security during these years will leave a negative imprint in this Root Chakra.  A negative imprint is like a scratch in your energy field; whereas, positive circumstances brighten your aura. Family wounds are also stored in this area of the body.  Perhaps your family always struggled financially or changed residences often.  This energy will then carry over to you.  Any unfinished business with parents is a Root Chakra issue.  In all of these cases, imbalances to the energy of the Root Chakra can set the stage for illness.

[Three Roses]

https://www.eclecticenergies.com/chakras/chakratest.php for chakra test. I was surprised how much better I felt after doing the suggested exercises just once.

[sanmagic7]

*possible triggeres*

i took the chakra test, and discovered that both my crown and root chakras were out of balance.  but, it's my root chakra that is in truly bad shape.  it came in at a -50%!  it's not even at 0, and, in fact, is far, far below it.

i began thinking about my life, my childhood, and realized that i remember my mother telling me how i had to have an anal cyst removed when i was still very young - under 2, possibly when a baby.  then i remembered that my parents were extremely concerned about bowel movements, having them daily, and that i remember them giving me enemas, but i don't remember ever complaining of feeling constipated.  this was happening before i was 9.  i don't really remember how many times it happened, but i sense that it was more than once.

for much of my life i've felt 'floaty', like i floated through life just seeing what was coming next, taking part, not planning anything, very spur of the moment, flying by the seat of my pants.  this makes so much sense now.  without a functioning root chakra, how could i possibly feel grounded?  know who i am?  know what i want?  anything that pertains to self-knowledge at all?

i began doing the meditation described at the eclectic energies site, focusing on my root chakra.  when it said that it should be akin to a transparent clear red color, in my mind's eye i saw mine as being the color and opaqueness of dried blood.  whew!  this is an awful feeling just writing about it.  i want to weep for my little girl-me. 

i have also been doing those energy exercises that 3roses suggested, and they are working well, so far.  it's only been about 3 days, but when i've tried other types of energy work i knew immediately that it didn't suit me, and was disturbing rather than helpful.  this didn't feel like that at all.  so, thank you 3roses for suggesting them.  and, than you, macandrui for this info as well.  i'll be looking it up, see what i can find out.

i just feel so bad that i'm such a mess in ways i'd never have guessed.  so sad, so weary that there's even more work to do, more areas to focus on.  glad for the explanations, but i'm also feeling like i'm too old for this sh*t!!!  dang!  i f***ing hate all those people who did this to me!  and who have gotten away with it, living their little lives with no frickin' justice!   aaaargh!  pisses me off!

ok, that came out of nowhere!  just more anger triggered by new information.  i hate this sh*t!

[Three Roses]

Sanmagic, I get so much inspiration from you! You are a force to be reckoned with, whether you know it or not. Your insights are spot-on and your compassion is highly apparent. Your posts and comments give me so much. 

I'm so sorry you feel like a "mess" but I'm so happy you're in our community. You give so much to all of us here.

I'm very happy the meditation exercises are helpful for you to do! Thank you for having the vulnerability to share with us, it's more help to me than I can say.

[sanmagic7]

3roses, you just made my day!  gotta run, but wanted to tell you thank you for what you said.  love you for it!  big hug!

[sanmagic7]

i'll tell you what, i don't feel like an inspiration to anyone right now.  i'm in horrific pain, can't concentrate, can't get comfy, snapping at my sweet hub who's done nothing but take good care of me when i'm like this.  am doing what i know how to lessen it, but right now nothing's helping, and i may just have to wait it out.  ugh!  it just gets so wearing . . .

but, 3 roses, thank you for your kind words.  they made me smile.  and, that felt great.  here's to keepin' on keepin' on!

[SweetFreedom]

for much of my life i've felt 'floaty', like i floated through life just seeing what was coming next, taking part, not planning anything, very spur of the moment, flying by the seat of my pants.  this makes so much sense now.  without a functioning root chakra, how could i possibly feel grounded?  know who i am?  know what i want?  anything that pertains to self-knowledge at all?

Great questions. I can totally relate. This has been a decades-long inquiry for me. Particularly about the root chakra. And I used to be SUPER floaty. Still am in many ways, but much more grounded and balanced through years of working on it. Eating meat, martial arts, yoga, exercise, walking on the earth, doing physical things have all helped.

One thought though: These concepts are just a model, a map of reality, but may not be 100% accurate. I feel it's very important to not get too caught up in these maps as if they are the capital-T 'Truth'. Be very careful that you are not using this as fuel to shame yourself further and get carried away with adding more to your narrative of seeing yourself as broken. Please.

i began doing the meditation described at the eclectic energies site, focusing on my root chakra.  when it said that it should be akin to a transparent clear red color, in my mind's eye i saw mine as being the color and opaqueness of dried blood.  whew!  this is an awful feeling just writing about it.  i want to weep for my little girl-me. 

I've heard it said from other teachers that the root can occur as rusty, deep brown, or even black, the color of deep & rich soil, the color of the earth, which is the root's element. The color of 'Yin' in Chinese medicine & Taoism. This may not be a sign that anything is wrong per se. Use this stuff to simply be aware of where youre at "now". You may check in a week from now to find a totally different energy or pattern. In other words, don't take it too personally.

I once had a psychic tell me that "everybody's root chakras are messed up" when I shared with her that I saw mine in a similar way. This might just be part of the condition of our times & people

i just feel so bad that i'm such a mess in ways i'd never have guessed.  so sad, so weary that there's even more work to do, more areas to focus on.  glad for the explanations, but i'm also feeling like i'm too old for this sh*t!!!  dang!  i f***ing hate all those people who did this to me!  and who have gotten away with it, living their little lives with no frickin' justice!   aaaargh!  pisses me off!

ok, that came out of nowhere!  just more anger triggered by new information.  i hate this sh*t!

I feel ya! It sucks, for sure. And it's good to be angry about this. You are right to hate it!

If it's any consolation to you, I like to remind myself that *if I am aware of how 'messed up' I am, then that means there is some part of me that is bigger than the messed up part that is able to see it, which means that I am more than just the messed up parts of me, which means I can heal it*

Sending good energy to you and your healing process 

[Dutch Uncle]

If it's any consolation to you, I like to remind myself that *if I am aware of how 'messed up' I am, then that means there is some part of me that is bigger than the messed up part that is able to see it, which means that I am more than just the messed up parts of me, which means I can heal it*

I like that, and it's definitely consoling and inspiring to me.

[sanmagic7]

thanks, sweetfreedom, for the info on the color.  you're right, it is a very earthy color that i see.  and i don't feel floaty anymore, so maybe that's changed more than i thought.  and, today, i'm feeling like i've pretty much gotten back on track w/ my recovery.  feeling better, more grounded, more surrounded by good people (just got rid of one i didn't need), and that's also feeling good. 

you're absolutely right about being more than the messed up parts.  i do know that.  my spirit is strong and much younger than my actual age, so i know i still have stuff to do while i'm here.  i'm just coming out of a very rough patch that began in jan., and it's been a long haul.  but, i'm not feeling quite as weary as i had been, have gotten a bit of energy back, and that feels good.  thanks for your concern.  as ever, keepin' on keepin' on!

[SweetFreedom]

Happy to hear you're getting back on track! Thanks for the well wishes, you as well