Darkly Funny: Shame For No Shame

[movementforthebetter]

Right as I was falling asleep last night I noticed shame about not feeling more shame over my molestation. Is that the critic talking? Nice play, trying to make me feel bad for not feeling bad! I woke myself up to write it down.

Master of bullying, that inner critic, but this time it didn't work. I had a good chuckle about how creative I am, though. Even my darkest corners invent new ways to try and keep going. And this is one of the first times I noticed how wrong this aspect of me is because it was so silly. I feel what I feel. I can't control that. And bullying myself to feel something else is hopefully never going to work again.

Anyone else ever find a reason to laugh at themselves by noticing the ridiculousness of their inner critic?

[Three Roses]

Yes! The lighter side of trauma! My own personal history seems to have created  in me a very dark sense of humor which not a lot of people "get". Although I've noticed that among my friends, the ones who do get it are the ones who also have traumatic experiences in their pasts.

[SweetFreedom]

Way to catch it! I like your style! 

I too can really appreciate having a dark sense of humor, and find that it helps so much when it comes to my inner/outer critic attacks. I think learning to laugh at our sometimes ridiculous minds a great sign of health and progress

[Danaus plexippus]

lately my mind has been a laugh riot

[woodsgnome]

Movermentforthebetter wrote: "Anyone else ever find a reason to laugh at themselves by noticing the ridiculousness of their inner critic?"

All the time, but not so much recently. The difference might have to do with my experience with improv theatre, where I was adept at casting a humourous twist in surprising ways. I was able to reference myself in this, and it seemed to blend in and defuse my otherwise harsh inner critic.

Recently this hasn't seemed as easy to come by, and I think I know why--I'm retired from that career situation. Maybe there was some sort of feedback loop that helped while I was actively performing. Despite my exceeding fear of people, which in an odd way might also have helped.

The other thing that seems obvious to me is that without the safety valve of my theatrical life, I'm now stuck in my own lonely quest for perfectionism, and when I feel inadequate, the inner critic is happy to fill the void.

So maybe the inner critic needs its own pal--an inner humourist who can subtly and kindly provide a different outlook even, or especially, in dark times and places. 

[Danaus plexippus]

Great idea!

[SweetFreedom]

It almost seems to me that this is what Standup Comedians are. They take their Inner & Outer critics and find a way to deal with them by finding the dark humor in it all, and then use that talent to amuse the rest of us. So there's no reason we can't all be in touch with our own inner comedian

[Three Roses]

 

[cosmo79]

Today, my IC berated me for not having bought a street pretzel for lunch: "You should have listened to your instincts! What's wrong with you? That pretzel would be so good right now," etc.

[movementforthebetter]

cosmo79's Inner Child in response to the Inner Critic: "These pretzels are making me thirsty".

[cosmo79]

Ha!