Your post hits home with me. It was nice to hear about things being done for you. Friendship is a great gift, and giving is a gift unto itself. Having friends who actually show their love for you, well, that is very special. Being such a person, a friend who is there, shows compassion and doesn't judge. That is something we can consciously learn. Some have it naturally, others need a wake up call so they understand.
I myself and experienced both the very best of giving, and also the very worst. It's all in character of the person and their own ability to recognize where a need actually exists. And true giving comes from the heart.
Today it is Sunday. I live on the family farm which I bought years ago. And I am the keeper of my families history, and the only one left that cares about that history.
From what I was told, my grandmother never missed a Sunday of church. She would walk the mile down the hill to the little church, where she was not allowed to become a member. She was not of the "Proper background" of heritage in the community. Yet she went to church every Sunday. Part of what she had to do in being able to come to America was she had to memorize the bible before she could leave her old country. Despite that, she was not allowed to join the church here, and from what I was told, the other church members didn't say much to her in the church. The minister on the other hand talked to my grandmother at length and always tried to stump her with quotes from the bible. The minister never could.
Giving was in my grandmothers blood, and she had run a boarding house and restaurant in Seattle for years before coming to this farm because of my grandfather's health. My grandmother made Sunday Dinner here on the farm and anyone and everyone was welcome at the table. There was one old couple who lived a few miles further away. They had no children, no other relatives, and in public they wouldn't speak to my grandmother. Every Sunday they showed up at this house for Sunday Dinner. My grandmother fed them, then would put together a basket of food for them to take and last them the rest of the week. This went on for years and they never gave my grandmother a thing for her kindness, and my grandmother never asked anyone for anything in return. She just made Sunday Dinner and all were welcome.
Years went by, my grandfather died young from his illness, and my grandmother raised the kids and helped others that showed up from her old country. Shirt tail relatives who lived on the farm to get their feet under them and get established.
During World War Two, one of those kids who was born here on the farm years before, and who my grandmother helped raise. He received the Medal of Honor for his actions in Italy. FDR presented him the Medal. Right after that happened, a "vote" was taken in the church, and they said my grandmother could now become a member of the church. My grandmother had a few choice words about that from what I was told, but the Sunday Dinners continued on the farm until she died.
Friendship is a gift, and giving is a gift. There is no purpose other than helping someone. And friendship is a true gift. My father once told me to "never turn down a gift". There is no right or wrong. A gift is a gift.
Your post made me happy today. Despite the hurdles, give what you can, try not to feel guilty, and all you can do is your best. If friends respond with kindness, then all the better. Consider yourself lucky, smile and keep doing what you do.
I have friends that don't reciprocate. That is life. Cherish the ones that cherish you, realize that what matters to you may not be in other peoples wheelhouses. But what does it matter? If you enjoy it and they don't, its not your problem, it is theirs.
Being nice and thoughtful is the true gift.
AncientSoul