thread for people who are not recovering

[Missingmermaid]

Is it possible to ever fully recover? I am an eternal optimist (only way I have survived) I lived in robot mode until I had kids and wanted things to be different and teach them emotions ect and then secrets spilled out (only therapist know my history). I thought eventually after telling, I'd get to a point with no nightmares, hypervillance, anxiety and panic attacks. It has been almost 2 years. How long does this taken. Disclaimer I never processed anything before, I also never spoken about anything outloud-I write everything down, I choke on words. My diagnosis are anxiety, ptsd (chronic), OCD: jinxed and researching. Why can't I just make myself better?! I feel ridiculous, like this should be easier. So frustrated with myself

[Three Roses]

Hello and welcome, Missingmermaid! I'm glad you're here.

Yes, healing and recovery are possible. Some exciting discoveries are being made about the brain and its ability to regenerate itself. This is referred to as the neuroplasticity of the brain, and there are articles on this site and others that will give you more info.

It is important, tho, to progress at your own pace.

Good luck to you in your quest for healing. Thanks for joining us! 

[mourningdove]

or I feel like anything that I might say is grossly inadequate or sounds shallow so though I've read many posts I may only lurk around without responding.

I feel like this a lot. You're not alone, Diamond.

[Manchesterford]

http://jamesclear.com/marginal-gains

I thought i would share this article to help you all see how great you are doing. Little steps, tiny tiny steps make a huge difference.  Love to you all xx

[Three Roses]

 

[Riverlad]

Lost my way a little in the lead up to Christmas. Not my favorite time. Thought I would check the forum. Now I feel connected again. Thanks to all. 

[mourningdove]

[Gentian]

Thank you for this thread.  I feel in like company here.  I lurk alot and compose responses in my mind, but back away from posting nearly every time.  Guess that means that no, not getting better over here. 

Got a big extra hit of long distance invalidation from my Dad this morning, so I'm glad to have a place to "hang out" (i.e., lurk) where I can at least imagine that it's probably safe to do so, even if no one has any idea I'm here.  LOL yet another habit of mine that I need to break...staying invisible as possible. 

I hope everyone found at least a small spot of joy this Christmas.

[Three Roses]

I hope you did, too, Gentian

[mourningdove]

I lurk alot and compose responses in my mind, but back away from posting nearly every time. 

I do this a lot. Glad you posted here, Gentian!

p.s. I love the quote in your signature line.

[BrokenDollMagnet]

My partner is out of town, deadlines at work are looming, I'm ridiculously upset at myself because of a request from my partner, I'm in the middle of switching SSRIs, my work computer has me locked out, the weather is incredibly icy and dangerous, I have a headache, and to top it all off, my pet had a still birth and seems very depressed. Her ears are tucked far back and she is sitting in a corner constantly.

I had a nervous breakdown last October and I haven't gotten back up. I am deeply depressed and easily triggered to feeling very badly about myself. I have to fight to keep from withdrawing from people, and it isn't working. I go to work, come home, and go to bed and read our play computer games. I take sleeping pills to end the day sooner. It's tempting to drink away my pain, but that just gives me a headache.

I am not moving forward!

I am not in a good place right now.

[Three Roses]

Big hug to you, BrokenDollMagnet. Hang in there! We're hanging in there with you.

[Candid]

Count how many years you took to get here and think how long it might take to 'fully' recover? Don't lose heart the journey is long and arduous and needs baby steps.

Aaaaarghhh! 

I've been in one long EF for about 18 months now, my circumstances worsening all the time. I am pinning my slender hope on trauma counselling that hasn't started yet. And I'm already scared the therapist will say something ignorant or dismissive in the first five minutes.

Just hanging on, here. And hanging out on this forum where I'm guaranteed people will understand. What a haven this is! Hugs to all who feel like giving up...

[BrokenDollMagnet]

I'm going to see my usual therapist again soon, probably Monday, if she's available. She's good for making me feel that my emotions are valid and my pain is real.

I wish you luck in seeing a new one. It's like finding a glove that fits. Most therapists are helpful, but only to those who are a good fit.  A glove that's too large is still a perfectly good glove, but it will only hinder you.

Please keep that in mind. It's ok to not feel a good fit with a therapist. They don't have to be 'bad' for you to keep shopping for a more compatible therapist.

(I'm just bringing this up because I've stayed with incompatible therapists because they weren't bad, but they weren't helping as much as others could. )

[joyful]

Sometimes I wish I was still oblivious to how broken I am and how much work I have to do to heal.
Feeling so overwhelmed and wondering if it's worth it.