New to here and c-ptsd in my relationship

[Zabba]

Hi,
I'm new here.
I found this place in a hopeless search on the internet for information.
My partner was diagnosed c-ptsd 6 years ago.
I'm looking for tools that can help me cope, maintain and stand up for myself. Really I want a good book to help me navigate this but I haven't been able to find one. A book for me, the loving partner of someone with cptsd. Please if anyone has recommendations.
I knew but didn't really know what it might mean for our relationship untill now. We've been together for three Years, planning futures together.
Only in the past year or so is his cptsd really started to affect me.
He's mean and overreacts to little things. It comes up in approx 3month cycles. We can talk about it sometimes, we're getting better at seeing it for what it is, we're both in therapy. It's getting grating for me. His episodes of anger/depression last about two weeks. I can hang for about one and a half then I burn out or snap back.
It's creating more and more distance and makes me not want to be around him. He's the most incredible human I've ever met aside, and I want to see if it can work.
It's nice to hear others expressing things I've felt. It will be nice to have this place, as friends don't understand. Thanks for being here.

[sanmagic7]

glad you made it here, zabba.  hopefully, you can get the info you need, as well as the support and understanding.

in your post, you mentioned 3-month cycles for your spouse.  this rang a bell with me, although in another vein (unless it pertains to him as well).  i'm in recovery for substance abuse (15 years), and have been an addictions counselor.  the 3-mo. cycle is common in recovery.  most often when someone relapses, it's on or near a 3-mo. anniversary (3, 6, 1 yr., etc).  it's as if (this is how it was explained to me) the person is only able to sustain the consistency of recovery for 3 mos. at a time, and triggers pop up or the urges to use strike.  often when people become aware of it, they are able to watch for those anniversaries and subsequently watch for triggers/urges.  it helps them fend them off and remain sober with minimal distress.

i don't know if that would be helpful for your husband and you to know and watch for and prepare for.  at any rate, welcome, and best to you both.  this can be difficult and exhausting for both parties involved.  just ask my husband! 

[Three Roses]

Hello and welcome! Understanding is key imo. There's an excellent book called "The Body Keeps The Score", search for it on YouTube as a free audio book. Hang in there! And thanks for joining