Derealisation when ill?

Started by Sienna, October 14, 2016, 06:04:26 PM

Previous topic - Next topic

Sienna

Hello peeps..
Just a question....Does anyone else have experience with disassociating when they are ill or have a cold?

I finally realised whats wrong with me..why the world feels ..wrong...unfamiliour.
I caught a cold. Not surprising what with the stress  - that did pass..dont know where it went. The feelings vanished as quickly as they started.
And i havent been eating. And have possible adrenal fatigue..so my immune system might not be the best...hense..the cold...
When my normal routine changes, it can bring on derealisation.
Even if i don't *feel* any anxiety about the changes, - it is probably still there, sub consciously
Havent been using the net in coffee shop, and havent been doing my online course = change in usual routine.- been feeling too unwell.

maybe triggers brought this on.
Maybe cos ive *stopped* and I'm not as...flighty as usual, trying to keep on top of the loneliness and stay busy...that I'm disassociated...
Its been like this since i had the cold and change in routine.
Wondering if it has anyhting to do with the fact that as a child, i had to look after myself when i was not well, so maybe as a child, i would disassociate -
1. from the physical sensations of being ill ??
2. from the natural desire and NEED to have someone help me out and take care of me when i was unwell
I have craved this lately, a mother, (alway have) but since this cold came on.

Surprisingly, out of the blue- some people have made some really caring gestures, which has helped me to feel *mothered* and cared about, which i really appreciated,
such as giving me a lift because I'm not well,
buying me honey and lemon and making me a honey and lemon drink,
bringing me some ice cream for my throat,
making sure i sit near the fire at the allotment the other afternoon,
and one lady brought some home made ginger tea in for me today.
So amazingly nice of them!

Not sure if these caring gestures are adding or causing the disassociation. No- derealisation started before then.
Is this normal? does anyone know what this could be about?

movementforthebetter

The world is unreal for me when I get sick... It's one of my key tells that I am getting significantly ill.

Is that depersonalisation? I don't know.

Just wanted to let you know you aren't alone. Hope you feel better soon.

Sienna

Hey Movementforthebetter,
Im sorry its this way for you too- though-it might make being ill more bearable for you, i don't know..

As for weather its depersonalisation- it can be hard to tell if derealisation and depersonalisation occur together - as then they feel like they are sort of...*mixed*.
Depersonalisation is when you are out of your body-
or you are tucked into your body, behind a wall- separate from the world,
for me- its like i have gone *into* my body, so I'm not really *in my body*. Feels like being drunk.
I can hear myself talking and my *self*-physical self, is out in the world...but I'm behind my own skin.

I hate derealisation. Im in my own body, but the world just feels *off*. Everything is the same, and everything looks the same, but it doesnt *feel* the same.
It feels to me, *uncomfortuble* inside.
Don't know if that helps you at all..
Thank you for letting me know I'm not alone, and for wishing me well.

Maybe its scary, not being *well*. Its harder to get things done, to socialise, and maybe its an element that an illness has taken over your body and you had no say in it.
Your not in control.
And a cold could possibly be the bodies way of saying- I'm run down- no more stress!-
and so thats opportune time for your mind to disassociate.
And also, for me, physical pain helps me get through- on the other side-helps there to be an element of control. ie. when my mother was having a go...if i heald off from peeing, i could focus on that instead.