Angry at therapist

[lizardguy]

Like many times before Im suddenly so angry, self hating, and feel so crushed becouse I feel theres just something about me that I can never get rid of, that makes people disrespect me as a person. About 2 years ago I was in therapy and the woman I had set me up for extra sessions with a man who said he was a surgeon but enjoyed being a therapist even though he had no training. Now all my life ive been a sensitive emotional person, something Ive always hated about me, so some things he said really hurt me and has stuck with me since. When I came into puberty I felt my mother behaved sexually to me and at a few moments did things that confirmed my suspicions and this hurted me more than anything have ever done, even if I was never abused more directly. Becouse of this Ive been feeling unsure if it makes sense I was so hurt by what happened, or if anyone would ever agree im right to feel the way I do and believe in me. In therapy I felt every therapist was suspicious if I was wrong about it. This surgeon immediatelly disbelieved me and blamed me for my mothers and my problems talking with eachother. I felt like I surely couldnt trust my reality one bit. I dont know if I should be upset about this or if Im just over-sensitive. I have no idea how to decide such things. He also called me lazy which really hurt me. Ive been lazy afaik but its like Im lazy in a way that destroys my life completely even before I felt I was depressed.

Well this is me, Im just a mess inside, overthinking and I feel I have no idea what to think about anything. I feel like things arent very real. I have no idea what I want to accomplish with writing this but it did give me some small relief.

[Three Roses]

 

You should never have been put in a position to receive "counseling" from someone who had no training in administering it. This would be like getting surgery from someone with no surgical training! No training, and he's counseling!? What utter tripe! Sometimes I wonder what people are thinking! Well, I guess, the short answer is, they're not.

Sexual abuse doesn't have to include touching. Any time an adult behaves sexually around a child, or uses a child for their own sexual gratification in any way, it can be called abuse.

Let that surgeon live just one day with the problems we have, and then is like to see him call you lazy. 

Your feelings are yours, and you are free to have them! 

[Rebel62]

I have to agree, that being put into a situation where you are getting therapy from someone who is untrained is not good. It reminds me of how people who have no real in-depth knowledge of clinical depression, tell people who are clinically depressed to "shake it off", "think positive" and so on. You can't "shake off" clinical depression, nor is thinking positive an easy thing to do. Before my daughters initial diagnosis of major depressive disorder, I'm sure I was guilty of the same thing. But to knowingly give therapy to someone with no training? Not cool. You have good reason to be angry. I hope you are seeing a trained, licensed therapist now.

[Manchesterford]

All of the above - please find yourself a qualified T and not one who would send you to a person such as this. You deserve appropriate support. I would also report this an and the T who recommended him to the regulatory body so this doesn't happen again.