Today I feel... (Part 1)

[anosognosia]

Anosognosia, I'm sorry to hear you're sick. Make sure you're taking care of yourself! Your body can't help it, after all.

If you're getting colds, with symptoms, it means your immune system is hard at work. It's trying to protect you. It's kind of a nice thought, to me.

I hope you feel better soon! 

Thank you, I've been feeling much much better this morning. I think I'm just the kind of person who gets sick often (maybe I should move to a warm state like Florida) so I've decided to just have a strategy for when I'm sick. Eg. Get more sleep, get up early to medicate before work, so I don't feel miserable throughout the day.

[Widdiful Falling]

...very conflicted.

It could be the lack of sleep talking, but I feel like my in-laws are a lot more comfortable with me than they were, before. Maybe because of my lack of sleep, I talked more than I usually do, or I just wasn't as vigilant. But I didn't feel the overwhelming need to keep track of everything that was going on like I usually do. This allowed me to follow one conversation at a time, and interject when it was appropriate. I didn't feel paralyzed, worrying about what I should say; how it is going to impact everyone, what it gives away about me, if it makes me sound crazy, etc.

I also feel sad, though, remembering easters when I was a kid.

[no_more_fear]

...very conflicted.

It could be the lack of sleep talking, but I feel like my in-laws are a lot more comfortable with me than they were, before. Maybe because of my lack of sleep

I also feel sad, though, remembering easters when I was a kid.

It's not lack of sleep, Widdiful Falling. It's real. It's a great step and don't diminish it. I too know that feeling of trying to be hyper-vigilant in every conversation. Now I realise it wasn't me that couldn't connect with people, and that's such an empowering feeling.

I'm with you on Easter too. Easter's were one of my happiest times as a child, so I'm thinking of that too today.

[anosognosia]

Today I talked to my B about my testimony of having gone through narental abuse. His reaction was basically a cold non reaction, followed by some hypersensitivity around other unrelated knitpicky things.  So invalidating.

Kind of confirms how dysfunctional my family growing up really was, to see his reaction like this. 

Not gonna lie though, I'm a little disappointed in him.

[Widdiful Falling]

Sorry about your bro, anosognosia. Maybe he'll come around in time? It takes a while to see the abuse sometimes. Best of luck to you. 

[Dyess]

 Today I feel ......
alone
scared
drained
tired
sick

[Annegirl]

 Bheart 
There are many forms of love, unconditional is the most valuable and powerful.
I know we don't see each other physically, but love is something you can't see.
I am starting to see how valuable to my recovery and growth this forum is.
with love from me.

[Annegirl]

  wouldn't it be nice to chat over a cuppa? but it doesn't matter. We can talk on here.
Have you still got that  T that was helping you?
Where do you find those lovely hug pics?
much love

[schrödinger's cat]

Afraid. We're having to find a new flat, but our town has seen an influx of new residents, rents are up, and we might have to move away to another town - which will very probably traumatize my oldest kid. I'm so afraid. I can't let my kids see that, it'll just make them feel insecure, so I'm having to scrape together all the hi-ho Mary-Poppins-like optimism I can find.

[Dyess]

Sorry about that Cat. Hope you can find something reasonable close to where you are. Just talk to your oldest, maybe they will understand what you are facing and what the options are. Best wishes to you though.

[schrödinger's cat]

Thanks, Trace. 

[Annegirl]

Yes Bheart
Oh dear SC, this sounds very hard. Moving is very stressful!!!      I wish I could help more only saying we have moved 16 times in 10 years and our kids are doing great, having said that i never ever want to move again though. I hope you will find a good place where your eldest will begin to feel at home again. Im really sorry for you to go through this stress.

[Widdiful Falling]

Ugh. Just ugh. I had a super long day yesterday (busy from 9am until 4am with only a 2 hour nap in the middle), and I got through it, but only with the aid of copious amounts of caffeine. Now I have a headache and nausea, but I have to find my wallet. This means cleaning the entire house by myself because everyone's at work and can't help me. My stomach feels all twisty every time I think about finding it. I have to find it today because there are events I want to go to this weekend, and I need my ID to get in. Maybe I'll take a nap.

[anosognosia]

Unmotivated (got sick AGAIN!) and still having a lot to do (things I want to do vs things I should do are weighing me down).

[Dyess]

Today I feel ....blah, empty and very unmotivated