How do we know we're not borderline?

[thebutterflyeffect]

Oh GOD, this was SO helpful! Especially the last post.

I swear it IS a continuum. You start off with cptsd and you slowly travel down to bpd and if you can't stop that, you end up with full blown npd and then it's really bad. This also explains why people with personality disorders get worse with age!

I know I have cptsd. I don't know how it would have being possible for me not to. I think by my early 20s I have mildly getting to the point of bpd, and I am very grateful to LIFE for having stopped that downward spiral. I don't even really care about whether I have a personality disorder. All I want to do is be the best person I can be and get as well as possible so that I can have meaningful relationships with my children and with my friends (who are lacking somewhat).

[spemat]

I was never diagnosed as borderline because my flashbacks came when manic or some other term was used when I was letting out pain.  My mania lasts for months.  My mom was borderline so to avoid it by having a "robot mode and she is part of the picture.  I have a lot of these feelings.

[tired]

i don't like how he uses it as an accusation.  when you feel bad about yourself it's easy to go along with that line of thinking.  being borderline is painful and should invite compassion and sympathy.

cptsd feels more like "stuff that happens to you" and bpd feels like "stuff that results from untreated cptsd".  if you do have bpd, it means you haven't received the help you need. 

i also think that it's not really nice to tell someone they have this or that disorder if you are in a position to trigger them, like if you're their spouse or parent.  it's one thing for someone here to tell me i have something, because everything said here feels compassionate because of the context. but the same thing said by my mother would make me mad even if it's technically true.  the real question would be, why are you telling me this.