Not knowing what triggers EFs? Some paranoia?

[alovelycreature]

I have been trying to figure out what is triggering my EFs in certain situations. For some reason when when I hear running bath water I go into panic mode. I have no idea why. It seems so strange and I can't figure out why. I feel I get so high strung that I have trouble checking in with myself.

Also when I am at home alone, whether night or day, I find myself getting superstitious. I always have this irrational fear that there is someone in my house. I can't figure out what is triggering this. I know it is a general feeling of being unsafe. I try to reality check myself, but find myself being superstitious. "What if there is something there and now I'm ignoring it?" Usually when my partner is home I feel safer, but he is going out of town a few times next month and I'm worried about being able to sleep.

On another thread I learned that someone else was having EFs in their home and they felt it was because they never felt safe at home. I don't know if that is what is happening. Or if my home life was so chaotic that I'm always waiting for a surprise attack. I'm wondering if anyone else has struggled with this or has any insight. 

[schrödinger's cat]

Hm, that feeling sounds familiar. The likeliest explanation I found for myself was a generalized sense of not being safe, of being at risk, of being threatened - just like you said. Or maybe I never really allowed myself to feel properly threatened and frightened by the things that were actually happening to me, so that feeling got cut off from its proper source, and my subconscious then attached it to other causes? (Much like people can be yelled at by their boss, and then they think they're fine, but as soon as their car breaks down, suddenly they're having a furious temper-tantrum.)

[alovelycreature]

Much like people can be yelled at by their boss, and then they think they're fine, but as soon as their car breaks down, suddenly they're having a furious temper-tantrum.

Yes! When I am put in a stressful situation with someone else, I tend to freeze. Thank you for the insight.

[schrödinger's cat]

With me, I've got the impression that my subconscious figures: 'if it's happened once, it can happen again', and just to be on the safe side, it assumes that Murphy's Law applies at all times. For a while, I couldn't cross any pedestrian's bridge without being afraid that it would break down. CBT helped (homemade version, no therapy, but eh, even a little is better than nothing).

[Annegirl]

Very good, SC this is also helpful for me Lovelycreature, paranoia i find is difficult to get over but I find looking at the moment helps me, what am I seeing right now in front of me, this is reality, nothing else.

[Butterfly]

On those hand its good you recognize the triggers but on the other hand it must be frustrating not to know the reason. From what I understand it might even be that an episode you felt small and abused was perhaps a rainy day so the running wat might trigger. It might not have originally been directly connected to bath water. Not sure this is accurate but that's what I understand of EF triggers.

For me even though *why* I'm triggers might be unclear, knowing x triggers y has helped me identify and 'brace myself' with deep breathing and grounding so I can ride it out easier.

[alovelycreature]

Anne the way you phrased that was very helpful. Reality is only what I see in front of me. Does anyone feel like they have an overactive imagination? I wonder if having an overactive imagination in childhood can cause these types of things to come up. I don't know if maybe it's a defense mechanism gone wrong? Go into imaginary land to escape?