Insomnia. Warning: possible trigger

[Silverlight]

I had a lot of trouble sleeping last night. I was awake until almost 5am, and had to get up at 6 to get my oldest child to school. It's awful. Due to being sexually abused in my sleep as a child I have so much trouble sleeping at night unless I'm absolutely exhausted, even then some nights it makes no difference. My psychologist explained that it's due to my body going into fight or flight mode.

My psychiatrists solution was to sleep during the day and stay awake at night. That's how I dealt with it before children but it's just not possible with a 2 year old as a single mother. I don't want to take sleeping pills again as I overuse them. I see my psychologist tomorrow so hoping she'll help. I just don't know how to deal with these triggers.

[bruisednotbroken]

I'm sorry you're having trouble sleeping due to the abuse you suffered. I know how important sleep is, especially with a 2 year-old to care for.

I have the same insomnia issues, also from being abused in my bed as a child (by an uncle).

I find that on the nights that I have trouble sleeping it helps to take a hot bath first, and to use very heavy blankets. It makes me feel more protected, I guess.

I'm not sure if this will help you, but it may be worth a try. 

[Silverlight]

Thanks bruisedbutnotbroken. I don't have a bath unfortunately but a hot shower is close enough so I'll try that.

[Dutch Uncle]

This article has helped me, at the very least by accepting I have sleep-problems. http://traumahealed.com/articles/rest-at-sleeps-threshold/

Survivors of sexual assault may still wake suddenly at the time of night the assault(s) occurred, or "inexplicably" resist going to bed until after that time.

I was wondering if the abuse you suffered happened at a specific time at night? If so, perhaps go to bed after that time like the article suggests, or if it was in the early morning, set an alarm before that time, so you can be awake then? And possibly feel safely asleep because of the alarm? Perhaps even stay up for an hour or so, then go back to bed?

My sleeping problems have a different cause, but I've learned what helps best is to get out of bed, do something (anything I feel like) and often I'll go back to bed again after a while, and sleep again.

[Dee]

I have the same problem for the same reason.  The only thing that has ever worked is sleeping on the couch.  It is being in a bed, in a bedroom that I find the most difficult.  My kids are older now and stay up very late.  My daughter goes to university and has scheduled her classes to accommodate this so the couch is out.  I still have to get my younger one up for school.  I'll try some of the suggestions.  I built a house without a bathtub, that's another topic, but I will try a hot shower as well.

I also keep my eyes open until I just fall asleep.  I'm a lot like a baby/toddler who fights sleep until it takes over.

[sinthia820]

I know this is an old thread but I wanted to post some suggestions for those who go through and read old posts.

I too had similar situations when I was fresh out of the trauma I required a very specific sleep setting to be able to sleep and then I was still restless. I slept in a closet with a door that could not be opened from the outside, in pitch black darkness with no ambient noise.

This allowed me to feel the safest so I could sleep. Knowing that if there was any noise I would hear it and if any light was introduced I would see it and then having the door as a third and final security point helped a lot.

Over time I was able to extend my feeling of security to my actual bed with the knowledge of who was in the house, where they were, when they all should be asleep, and added other sleep rituals to my routine. The same blanket with a specific texture. My hand gripping a hunting knife secured in a holster that couldn't be accidentally removed in my sleep. Eating or drinking something specific just before bed (something I never had during the trauma years) yay cookies and milk.

All this retrained me, this ritual was my security. Every night that passed where I was safe while following these rituals allowed me to gradually feel safer and safer until sleep came easy.

I still can't sleep if there are new people in my house, I have to be the last one asleep when visiting family, sleeping in a strange place is still next to impossible (and often calls for curling up on the floor of the closet) but building that safe space and ritual was everything. I'd say also if you are having a difficult day and think a flashback is imminent then don't follow your routine that day. On rough days sleep restlessly away from your security routine. You are going to anyway, but at least if you avoid your security routine on these days then you can avoid feeling traumatized while in your safe space and loosing the safety you've built.