What Do You Do When You First Wake Up Every Day?

movementforthebetter · August 26, 2017, 03:47:16 PM

Hi all,

Something I've identified lately is that I wake up and almost immediately I start having intrusive thoughts about work. Does anyone else have this, too? It starts my day off with anxiety and if the thoughts are particularly bad I will basically freeze and have a lot of trouble getting my day started. I've never been someone who can leave work at work, precisely for this reason. The thoughts can be of other worries than work, like interactions with people, but work is where I spend the most time so I suppose it makes sense.

I'm curious about how you guys start your days. With stress and busyness I fell out of my good habit of yoga first-thing. I also struggle with meals - particularly breakfast - because I have to be up extremely early.

I'd like to hear how you all get going in the morning and hopefully glean some new ideas to break the rut I'm in. Thanks!

Eyessoblue · August 26, 2017, 05:13:13 PM

Hi I wake up and start shaking both inwardly and outwardly I then think how am I going to cope with today! I do some journaling to write my thoughts down then I try to find affirmations to make it feel better. Every day feels like a struggle but I do normally get over it at some point!

Elphanigh · August 26, 2017, 05:50:34 PM

Hi there,

Lately I have woken up very similarly to you. I wake up and am almost instantly in an anxiety filled state, sometimes even an ef. I too am working on figuring out how to start my morning better, and struggling with meals.

I am really curious what others will say here. Thank you for posting

Gwendolyn · August 27, 2017, 04:57:49 AM

When I get up, I immediately do not want to go to work, so as I get ready, I tell myself it's going to be okay, I'll have a good day, just keep busy and my day will fly by and before I know it, I can relax at home again.
Deep breaths and positive thinking (even though it seems nearly impossible some days)
As for meals, I try to make something the night before (I can't eat food first thing in the morning so I do smoothies)
By the time I'm done lying in bed until the last minute, and getting myself ready I don't have time to whip something up.
And when I get something healthy in me in the morning, it makes me feel good (even though I still want those donuts lol) try making a fruit salad made with yogurt and granola the night before.

Deb · August 27, 2017, 05:21:57 AM

I also really struggle every morning. Especially living alone. Im keen to read other peoples posts. Today i stayed in bed. Its past 3pm now and i havent got up. My cat hasnt been fed. Poor thing. Its just there is no point in getting up. Has anyone else felt like this and stayed in bed? I try to make little goals on better days like, if i can just make it to the couch in the loungeroom or make a hot drink and then I can come back to bed and read. Or turning the radio on can help.

Candid · August 27, 2017, 08:31:33 AM

This sounds like rumination, movementforthebetter. If work is your chief time-filler and the people there your main social network,
it's only natural that whatever worries you have are focused on that environment. Being 'on the job' in your free time... whew! I'd be anxious too. I'm taking a wild guess that you don't sleep well enough, early enough, to be able to get up easily for that "extremely early" start.

As to your question, I'm on the back step with coffee and cigarette before I can think at all. And that's why I have these addictions: decades of dragging myself up to go to work, stay awake, and be able to function for eight hours or so. Now my chronic insomnia has turned acute and I don't go to work (alas!), I've cut coffee right down and am -- later in the day -- more thoughtful about whether I want this cigarette right now or not.

Deb, doesn't your cat's desire to eat count as a "point in getting up"? For how long has making it to "the couch in the loungeroom " been a goal made on "better days"?

Deb · August 27, 2017, 08:44:11 AM

Candid, yes, on alot of days feeding sam has been the reason for getting up. Occasionally i'll have a day like today where not even his trying to get me up will work. It is only occasionally, he's usually well fed and looked after. Days lile these come and go. Since the psychologist hurt me there have been a lot of 'just get to the couch' days. Do I sense judgement there?

Candid · August 27, 2017, 10:45:39 AM

No judgment from me, Deb. It looks as though I misinterpreted your post. I read that on a better day your goal was to make it as far as the couch, and naturally that made me wonder what a worse day looked like. I'm now thinking you must have meant that on a better day you are able to set goals for days "like today". Is that right?

I'm concerned because you wrote on another thread that you hadn't eaten and weren't drinking water. I read that as not drinking at all. Now I understand you're drinking fluids (you mentioned a hot drink) other than water.

I'm sorry that came across as judgmental. I'm beyond exhaustion myself and my goal right now 11.45am is to log off and get up that loft ladder.

Deb · August 27, 2017, 12:46:36 PM

Hi Candid, I hadnt had anything to drink till about 4pmish when I got up and had a hot drink. Yes, staying in bed all day doesnt happen very often. On a better day 'on days like this' (not every day) id get myself to the couch. Hope thats clears it up. Everyone is feed twice over and cuddled now.

movementforthebetter · August 27, 2017, 12:50:57 PM

I usually have no problem going to bed early enough, with exceptions. It's that I chronically do not stay asleep. And I don't want to drug myself because I still feel the effects the next day.

If it's ruminating, I don't know how to stop it from starting. I frequently dream about work, too. Once I reach a certain stress threshold it's almost always there. Work, school, periods of stress all bring it on. It doesn't take much for me to reach that point with C-PTSD. And the only time I don't usually deal with it is when I am not working. It took me months to calm down after my last job ended. Believe me, I'd rather not be experiencing this.

Blueberry · August 27, 2017, 08:09:39 PM

I have a super early start tomorrow. It's time I organised my bag so I can just leave the house at 4:45 am, without racing around trying not to forget things. Yikes, alarm at 4:15, or better 4:00. However wanted to reply to Deb.

Quote from: Deb on August 27, 2017, 05:21:57 AM
I also really struggle every morning. Especially living alone. .. Today i stayed in bed. Its past 3pm now and i havent got up. My cat hasnt been fed. Poor thing. Its just there is no point in getting up. Has anyone else felt like this and stayed in bed? I try to make little goals on better days like, if i can just make it to the couch in the loungeroom or make a hot drink and then I can come back to bed and read. Or turning the radio on can help.

I often stay in bed, not usually all day, but 12 noon isn't totally unusual. but sometimes it is in fact all day. Often afterwards I discover that I really needed that time. In fact I have had all sorts of realisations about this 'staying in bed'. It's not all reprehensible at all.

Deb, I really relate to this "no point in getting up" or only getting up to feed a pet. It has got a lot better though. It may for you too.

cosmo79 · August 28, 2017, 04:32:27 PM

I can really relate to fear of work, even though mostly I only have a part-time, stay-at-home job! Something strange has been making mornings better for me: Pete Walker mentions a "daily lament" somewhere in his book; and, instead of fighting the sadness when I wake up, I tell myself that I only have to get from my bed to my couch. On the couch, I let myself feel as sad as I want, and, when I'm up to it, comfort myself as a friend might. This is helpful because it feels like self-care, and I don't fall back asleep on the couch. Thank you for posting about this. I bet a lot of other people have been having the same question -- I know I have.

Blueberry · August 28, 2017, 07:30:22 PM

What do I do on waking up? Sometimes I turn my alarm off and go back to sleep. Like this morning.

Only thing is, I could have decided not to since I actually have to get out of bed to turn my alarm off. Would be more understandable if I could turn alarm off from my bed. Anyway, that's not what I do every day, but in certain phases it's pretty common.

fullofsoundandfury · August 31, 2017, 02:55:13 PM

Great topic to consider, thanks for starting this thread.

I usually wake up in an emotional trigger. I immediately light a cigarette and drink a coffee and look at social media to escape from my intense panic. I also have intrusive thoughts about work and interactions with people like you movement, sometimes memories. I never eat breakfast though I did go through a phase a few weeks ago of having breakfast that I'd prepared the night before. I have insomnia so I wake up quite exhausted. I tend to waste a lot of time trying to distract myself by numbing, and leave myself very little time to get ready for work.

Not things I think about clearly if not prompted to write them down. Thanks again.

Look at how pervasive the effects of childhood abuse are. Unbelievable. Lucky there is hope!

NV · September 01, 2017, 07:58:51 AM

Deb, I do this too with the no water and not getting out of bed!! If I'm not accountable to someone/something I don't get up on my bad days. Weirdly, having my room really clean and tidy (which i struggle with) helps me to get up and face the day with a more positive attitude.