I forgot everything about my present life for an hour. Should I be worried?

Started by DecimalRocket, November 01, 2017, 05:59:46 AM

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DecimalRocket

I had the most bizzare experience.

I'm new to the idea of CPTSD and I was reflecting on my past . . . why everything came to be . . . and it was too much. At that moment, I forgot nearly everything about the present.

I stared at my room and didn't know why it looked different. I felt my body and I wondered why I was bigger than I was as a child. I looked at the little memories I had of recent times and concluded it was the memories of a different person. CPTSD? The me then laughed. Of course not. I kept thinking I had a happy family despite barely able to remember anything about them.

Later something backflipped in my mind and suddenly I switched to different memories of my life. For some reason, my mind managed to filter all the bad scenarios in life to just remember my accomplishments. Suddenly, I became arrogant. I remember thinking, "I have no mistakes. I'm perfect. Perfect. Everyone else who isn't is terrible."

Later on, I'd remember a little bit about this forum and getting the sense that I wanted to remember this place. I felt gratitude for the people who were kind to me. The memories then flooded back. . . and I felt myself grieve. I did some grounding techniques and I went back to how I am usually. But I still feel like . . . my life isn't real.

Uhhh. . . What just happened?

Dee


I have done variations of that.  It is a form of dissociating.  Dissociation can happen in so many different ways it can be confusing.  I usually can find the trigger if I look hard enough.  It can be a smell.  When it is at home it is usually something that was on TV that I wasn't paying attention to.  Then it is a saying, or the last one was a car that had been my family car.  It just reminded me of my childhood.  One time I got stuck so badly I thought I was hallucinating.  Turns out I wasn't, there was a trigger when I went back through what got me there. 

:hug:


BlancaLap

What happened to you was dissociation, but I think you already know that. I'm sorry it happened to you and I can say I can relate to your post A LOT. Wish you the best!