Guidelines reminder - Posts

[Three Roses]

Hello, everyone!  Every once in a while, we go over some of our forum's Guidelines for clarification. This one has to do with the tone we use here in our posts.

Posting Style Guide
   
   • Do not use offensive, demeaning and/or inappropriate language. This refers to any language that is demeaning of others (e.g., sexist, racist, homophobic, transphobic, calling someone a derogatory or demeaning name such as "jackass") and/or which is considered by many to be vulgar....

http://outofthefog.net/C-PTSD/forum/index.php?topic=1616.0

It is entirely possible to be offensive, demeaning, and/or inappropriate without using any expletives or insults. Passive/aggressive remarks are one example - i.e., "Y'know, I could really help you with your recovery, I'm further along than you." Or "You're still not over that?" (More on passive aggression https://www.yourtango.com/experts/dr-rhoberta-shaler/12-ways-know-if-you-are-passive-aggressive

We are here for our own recovery, but this includes how you speak to others. If you are seen as a person who likes to put others down or question their abilities, chances are you'll be avoided. This can lead to you feeling ostracized, judged, criticized, etc. So, learning to treat others with respect is part of our own recovery.

Secondly, we support others who are here, on this forum. You cannot know what that person has been through or how far they've come in their personal journey to healing. We are here to receive support and validation; we are here to give support and validation to others.

These rules apply not only to our postings on boards, but to our private messages. If any member here receives a pm that fits these descriptions, please click the "Report to Admin" link in the bottom portion of your message window.

Thanks for reading! 

[radical]

If I've done this, I need to know about it for my own recovery.  I don't know if I'm being paranoid, but I am aware that I'm pretty off right now, so this is the kind of time when I could be most liable to have done something like this, due to my own stuff, and been unaware of it. 

I don't want to hear from anyone who hasn't been hurt, but if I have hurt someone, I need to know and would like to be able to make amends.

[Dee]

No one needs to be concerned, this is a reminder.  If there was an issues you would of received a PM to work out the problem.  No worries.

[Contessa]

Thank you for the reminder.

I know I wrote a post that was deliberately edgy recently. It aimed to take a common self inflating saying which at it's core, is actually self (and to others) insulting by implementing an unnecessary point of comparison (apples to oranges style), and debunk it. It gave credit away for self triumphs.

I knew it was a risk because superficially it may or may not have been obvious, but it was a departure from my normal style that was ultimately aimed to individually empower.

Apologies for any offense all... I love me and I love and respect you. I hope you love you too

My onion brain has grown a few more layers methinks!

[Three Roses]

As Dee said, it's just a reminder. We would always let a person know up front if it was about them. 

[Contessa]

All good three roses and dee. Just felt a little need to express that for some reason anyway.

[Kizzie]

In this case there was a member who was over stepping the guidelines and as a team we made the decision to ban them after several warnings and no change to their behaviour. 

So this is also an opportunity to let the community know we will do our best to keep the community safe and discussions respectful but that we need your help to do so. 

Thanks everyone