Intrusive Flashing Image Nightmares, Dream-Like State

[plantsandworms]

Occasionally (usually when I'm particularly stressed or anxious) I experience this horrible phenomenon in my sleep. It happens as I'm falling asleep but not quite there, and I will begin to see this rapid mental slideshow of unsettling images. It's usually a mix of bad memories, things I'm afraid of or stressed about, and grotesque/disturbing images that I've seen in movies or in the news. Sometimes I pass through this phase quickly and am able to redirect my thoughts more positively and fall asleep. Often these days I leave my TV on to play some lighthearted sitcom and it helps keep my brain from going to this place. For the last few days, though, I feel like I'm seeing these horrible flashing nightmare images all night and never fully falling asleep. Then during the day I feel so exhausted I begin to feel like I'm living in a dream - it reminds me of the feeling I get when I'm disassociating during a particularly stressful situation. Does anyone else experience these nightmares? Does anyone know if there's a term for it, or a cause, or a treatment? I am going to my therapist's office tomorrow but feel like I should schedule an appointment with my primary care doc as well in case there is something more to it. I've never experienced it this often or intensely and the sleepless nights are beginning to accumulate a bit too much for me to function. It also makes me fear that I'm mentally "unraveling" in some more permanent way. Please let me know if you have insight into this! I am at my wit's end.

[Rainagain]

Hi

I feel for you as I get something similar.

The going to sleep and for me waking up state can be quite distressing. I get intrusive thoughts crashing in, sometimes thrash about and shout out.

I tried to tell a psychologist about it but he gave me a medical term and told me he gets it too as it is common.

I knew he hadn't understood how violent these episodes were for me but didn't try to argue.

So, there is a name for it and a mild form is apparently quite common, but as usual we get the off the scale ramped up version.

Its not the same as nightmares which also involve thrashing and shouting, its something different.

When I get it bad for too many days in a row I get lost time episodes during the day if I sit still for any length of time, its like dreaming with your eyes open but with no memory subsequently.

I think extra stress is the cause, my partner can tell by how I am during the day if I'm in for a bad night, I don't recognise it in myself though so its mostly a surprise......

Its pretty alarming, I'm sorry you have it too.

[Hope67]

Hi plantsandworms,
I also get this experience sometimes, and from my memory, I think it is in relation to a term called 'hypnogoghic state' (sorry - may have spelled that incorrectly), but it's that 'state between wake and sleep, and it's supposed to be a time when you can experience hallucinatory type experiences - and I have literally seen things that are like 'watching a television' in terms of their lucidity.  They can be like random snapshots of things, and the content can vary a lot - I've also 'watched a squirrel' or seen a room with different objects in it - they are often jumbled up, and don't make sense - and can be all kind of things.

I don't tend to worry about it anymore, as I was reassured by the 'hypnogogic' explanation of them, and that they are 'relatively common'.

But I used to fear them, and to feel very concerned about myself mentally - before I realised it's something that people can experience in that sleep experience.

I also get night terrors that are violent - I've written about some of my experiences in a different part of the forum, and I think they are frightening - so I wonder if perhaps you get a mix of the two things - the hypnogogic thing and also night terrors too?  I don't know.  I think it's hard to make sense of things - but comparing experiences and learning more, can help for definite.    to you, if that's ok. 

I'm glad you spoke to your psychologist about it.  Might be worth talking more - so that he understands more about your experiences.

Hope 

[Blueberry]

While falling asleep I used to get images of horrendous physical violence being done to me, which was never done IRL, not anything like to that extent. 

I can remember fighting back in bed like kicking. Maybe that helped re-ground. It's a long time ago now, long before I knew about CPTSD.

Eventually I interpreted these images as symbols for the emotional abuse that was done to me. If I remember rightly finding an interpretation was helpful. At some point or other they ceased. But I can't say anymore whether that gradually happened or whether I actually worked on it with T.

Sitting with you plantsandworms because I know it's horrible.