Trumped Out

[DecimalRocket]

I agree with Elpha. I'm LGBT too, and sometimes I worry about how there's no gay marriage where I am. 

Just glad you're doing something to help people like me. It can be hard, I'm sure.

[Elphanigh]

Hugs to you both 

[Kizzie]

I started an LBGTQ section in "Books" (http://www.outofthestorm.website/books-1/), and added in Marlon Bundo (still out of stock).  I also found this resource which I added too - https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/3319545078?ie=UTF8.  If anyone has additional books about CPTSD/trauma and the LBGTQ community just PM me.

[Elphanigh]

Kizzie, this made me so happy to see  I don't have additional but if I happen upon any will send them your way

[Kizzie]

I found some more and will be uploading them this morning.

[Jdog]

Thanks for helping me and my fellow LGBTQ community members, Kizzie!  Being disowned for being just who you are is such a common theme in our community, and the warm acceptance here is very healing. 

In equal opportunity fashion (showing that hate is a chameleon but is always the same ugliness underneath), Trump is once more going on about getting transgender people out of the armed services and not allowing anyone in that community to serve again.  Along with his hatred of immigrants, the environment, and so many other things, it appears that unless you are actually a member of his family you will be targeted for annihalation.  Just nutty buddy stuff, and dangerous to boot.

Anyway, thanks to you, Kizzie, for supporting us and thanks to the many others here who do as well.

[Kizzie]

I am trying not to watch the news much (and it really does help for those of you who are having similar triggers to Trump as is talking here), but I did hear this JDog. It is ridiculous and hate based, just like so many of the actions of this administration. I also heard that thankfully a number of generals contradicted his reason (that being transgendered  was a threat to the integrity of units).    

Being subjected to the whims of someone who lacks empathy for others and not being able to escape is one of the conditions for the development of CPTSD.  What he is doing is nothing short of traumatizing.  The hope I do hold for so many of the groups Trump is going after is that most are tightly knit, supportive communities and best of all many have the right to vote       In our case, we didn't have anyone on our side, we had to hide, be silent and there was little we could do escape our perpetrators, we simply had to endure.  That said, we are coming together in communities like OOTS and that gives me some hope. If people have places like this and access to the books about CPTSD available now perhaps they will begin recovery earlier on in life 

Anyway, I started this thread because I just could not hold in all that Trump being in power was triggering in me any more and I came to the conclusion I shouldn't.  I was doing the same thing I had done for years, not talking and that nothing was going to change for me or others if I remained silent. The fact that I am not even in the US and Trump still affects me so incredibly deeply speaks to how traumatizing those with NPD (or anyone i who abuses others for whatever reason), are or can be to those around them. 

Posting here finally has led to a real sense of relief and even healing for me and that speaks volumes     

[Blueberry]

Posting here finally has led to a real sense of relief and even healing for me 

Wow Kizzie  Way to go! Shows what just being able to express your own truth and be heard can bring in terms of healing!

I'm glad you're using the forum for this, allowing yourself to show yourself on here and in the process get some healing. Instead of providing and running the forum and being there for the rest of us. Of course it's great that you do the latter!! Where would we be without you and this service?!? But I have a good feeling developing when I see and hear you're getting something tangible out of this forum too 

[DecimalRocket]

That's interesting, Kizzie, and I'm glad you're doing something to help.

Now that you're trying to do something for the LGBT, mind if I suggest you add some options to gender in our profiles? There's a wider spectrum of gender in the LGBT world, and I feel kinda weird about being more "genderfluid" where my gender identity changes according to my mood. No place to put a preferred pronoun here (which is more of a gender neutral "they.")

Kind of awkward to have people refer to me as specific pronouns when they don't know that in this forum. 

[Kizzie]

I'm open to that DR, what options do you think should be added? (e.g., "fluid?)

[Elphanigh]

I am really glad this discussions can be had here  Just warms my heart to see, thank you for bringing that up Decimal rocket

[DecimalRocket]

Here's a neat list of gender identities if you want to take a look. https://www.lifehacker.com.au/2016/07/explained-the-33-gender-identities-recognised-by-the-2016-australian-sex-survey/

Though, I think putting everything in there complicates things. Maybe it's better to put in some umbrella terms in there. Transgenders who identify as women can just put female, and those who identify as male can just put male. Though, who knows? Maybe other people like that here (I've seen a few) have a different opinion.

Genderqueers (the umbrella term for those with identities outside the two main genders) makes it more complicated. This includes people who feel like both, neither, fluid or a third gender. Personally, I like it specific because for some strange reason, I don't really have much of a control on what gender I see myself (it makes no logical sense to me), and these terms feel very important. Though, maybe just putting genderqueer as just a third option is alright.

That, or doing away with options altogether and just make the gender option something you can type anything into. Like how putting where you live is treated, signature or profile description. That seems like the best option for versatility to me in how anyone would like to put there if you ask me.

[alliematt]

I hear you all.  Some of my beliefs may be different from some of yours, but I don't blame any of you for being "Trumped out".  I cast a protest vote for Snoopy because I couldn't vote for either candidate.  I resent how he's exploited the divisions in this country, I resent his incompetence, and I resent those who defend him with, well, at least the economy's good; or, we didn't elect him to be our pastor. 

I know no President is perfect, but I am truly concerned about this one.

[Kizzie]

I hear you all.

Best words ever Allie, and  that's really what it's all about isn't it?!   

DR - I think it might make sense just to take gender out altogether, same for a few other things like age and web site title and URL  If members want to reveal that kind of info they can do so in posts, but I'd hate for anyone to feel they should (there's that dreaded word) fill those blocks in their profiles. 

FYI, I went over to OOTF yesterday to see if I could get  hand with this and a few other IT things. They are still in the midst of working on the handover from Eclipse (founder of OOTF and IT person for both sites who recently left), which includes banking, taxes, corporation status, etc so I'm going to wait until the dust settles before I ask for a hand. 

[Bluevermonter]

I just want to weigh in about the idea that only psychiatrists and other mental health professionals can diagnose a PD.

I am a math and science person thanks to my older brother who let me use his microscope, telescope, chemistry set, etc when we were kids.

He also let me use his various field guides. So now many decades after university, I still use field  guides to stars, trees, birds, seashells, insects, etc you get the picture, right? I have a bookshelf full of them.

I see no difference between the DSM and field guides. The field guides let amateurs go out and identify the trees in their backyard or the birds they see on vacation. Birders like me keep a "life list" based on my identification from my field guide.

You guys see where this is going. The DSM is written in straightforward language that any reasonably educated person can understand. Might they get an id wrong? Sure. Of course.

But when so many of us familiar with the DSM recognize Trump as a raging narc, well. It's like my birder companions on a hike pointing to a winged creature and nodding as one, "Yep, blue jay!"