Eating disorders

[milkandhoney11]

Growing up my parents have always described me as a picky eater because there were so many foods that I couldn't eat. It might be because of their smell, texture, appearance, or any other characteristics but something about them literally made me feel nauseous. The problem was that my parents never took me seriously and refused to listen but either forced me to eat unsafe foods or let me go hungry. There were so many times when I had to go without food at school because they had once again provided me with a packed lunch that I could not eat without feeling he urge to vomit.
As I got older the number of foods I could safely eat got less and less and somehow this was especially apparent when I was stuck in an emotional flashback or depressive episode when I would suddenly find myself unable to eat anything. I would feel very hungry and go to the supermarket to get something to eat but often left without buying anything because all the food suddenly looked and smelled so disgusting.
I have since found that I was not just a picky eater that was just trying to "make life difficult for my parents" but that I am indeed suffering from a little known eating disorder called ARFID (Avoidant/Restrictive food intake disorder). Apparently this disorder is often co-morbid with Autism and ADHD but can also be caused by trauma and anxiety so I was wondering if anyone here has any experience with eating disorders.
Have you sought help from anyone? Are there any strategies that help? I feel like I have lost a lot of weight recently and think that I should probably try to do something about this but don't know what or how

[Blueberry]

M+H, there are quite a number of people on here with eating disorders or other eating 'issues'.
There is a common thread here https://cptsd.org/forum/index.php?topic=11152.0 where you can look or post in fact. I don't remember seeing what you describe. That doesn't mean it's not there or that somebody won't recognise what you describe and post something on it. I have a bunch of eating issues, but not what you describe.

Wishing you the best with this. 

[rainydiary]

I am in a number of autism or neurodivegent groups on Facebook where folks talk a lot about this topic.  I don't have any specifics as I haven't read those closely, but if you use that platform I wonder if you would find some suggestions or information. 

[rainydiary]

I just tried searching one of the groups I am in and someone mentioned that there is an AFRID Adults group on Facebook.

[milkandhoney11]

Thank you Blueberry and Rainy, I really appreciate your help.
I will have a look at the thread in more detail and see if I can join that Facebook group. Thank you

[dollyvee]

Hi M&H,

This is interesting. I was also labelled as a picky eater by my mom. As a kid I had a lot of health stuff happening - allergies, asthma etc. When I eat gluten now by accident my mouth will usually have some canker sores a few days later. I remember having a lot of these growing up. I do wonder if, for me, being a picky eater was related to those issues. Although, your situation sounds different.

I also have many symptoms/characteristics of ADD and was something I looked into. However, I was diagnosed with a mycotoxin/mold issue around the same time and it can also alter the dopamine pathways in the brain. Dopamine issues are ADD issues. As an adult, I find I sometimes have issues cooking, getting the oomph to make good food, even though I quite like cooking etc. I was putting this down to executive dysfunction/dopamine but I don't know. Sometimes I wonder if there is something almost OCDish going on. Looking back on it, I also think there is the element of control involved. Growing up in a chaotic environment, one of the only things I had control over was what I put in my body.

I also looked into PAN/PANDAS and streptococcal infections as I had a bad strep infection as a child. I can't remember if it was after that, but I think it was, that I started being really mindful of what I was eating calorie wise etc. PAN/PANDAS can be OCD like symptoms coming up in children. I had a GI map done last year which showed high levels of strep bacteria, though it was apparently "good strep."

I'm sorry though, I think having to go through things like that at a young age probably had a big impact on you.

dolly